A Middle Aged Trophy Husband's True Tales.

This week has been a blur.

2011-01-29T07:53:00.000-08:00

This week has been a blur. I have had more visitors, calls, emails and messages than I have had in months. I feel so special. I still prefer the blog because I get tired going through the same stories all the time. Many friends from out of town want to fly out and visit. These are people I have known for decades so I struggle to fit them in and give each a chance to just be here. My big brother and sister are flying in on Monday until Saturday and they will be the last guests who actually stay with us until a time might come again where either MrD or I can cope. The day after they leave we have booked flights back to Manila. I need to settle my legal affairs, talk to our staff and face MrD’s family with the news because he has been unable to go into the real details over the phone.
My doctor told me if I needed to do this trip it should be now and make it short.
I have gotten new medicines for the pain and stress so I have had some better sleep time.
The nutritional three week cleansing has moved into the last phase of the vegetable protein stage and I hear rumours from MrD that next week I will be allowed to have some small amounts of dead animals. I can hardly wait.
Cancer Rocks but in truth, this week I have had to dig a little deeper to feel that side of this adventure.
MrD is really at his end of all the care he can give and we are interviewing home help for when we return.
Our newly designed upstairs wardrobes arrive and were installed Thursday to oohs and aahs. If our luck holds the bed we ordered last month before all this struck should be delivered on Saturday so my family doesn’t have to sleep on the floors.
The palliative care people have been here the most figuring ways to make my life at home easier so they have installed special air cushioned bed pads, a pole to help me get out of bed easier, or practice my pole dancing, a toilet seat with arms to get up and down on, a shower seat for the time down the road when I need to sit and rinse and maybe the hardest to accept but pretty cool, is my new black padded wheel chair. They adjusted everything to fit it too my body but it may be a bit before I can fit my mind around it. I thought of journeys out wearing big hats or even veils but everyone would know it was the Trophy H right away.
Everyone have a grand week. I sure plan to have a great one.

MrD signs up the Trophy H for a cleanse.

2011-01-22T07:59:00.000-08:00

Wow. My week went by with not a dull moment. I promised MrD to fight this disease. Last week was all about stuffing your face with fat and sugar but MrD a hired private nutritionist for some alternative cancer healing.
She has me on a three week cleansing program. The first five days of my cleanse, I have no protein. I drink brewed, juiced and stewed powders at strange and non flattering times of the early morning late evening. MrD loves to play the disciplinarian. I keep a stiff upper lip with the food.
As my reward for surviving the first 5 days and for being able to introduce protein to my meals, I invited MrD, MsB (the nutritionist) out to dine at one of MsB’s favourite restaurants.
Trophy H slips in a complimentary restaurant review “East Meets East” is a South East Asian popular restaurant on West Broadway here in Vancouver. Our party of three arrived at 6:30 without a reservation but their friendly staff found us a table after a short wait. The owner was offering small cups of their delicious chai variations. My soy milk chai spice tea both soothed the pallet and warmed it up for the food. I love when a restaurant takes time to welcome you in a special way.
The three of us each ordered a Tali tasting plate. I chose the wild salmon in a sauce that was mango, but might have been pineapple. My sauce turned out to be not worth remembering. And I would have to mention, my silent reader, that the salmon was overcooked. I loved my dahl, but couldn’t find any cucumber flavour in the raita. My portion of aloo gobi was sadly a little over done. But everything was forgiven. I was out and about. The place was noisy and I was burping protein. I was with MrD and MsB who showed me all week that they were fighting this disease. I had nothing to complain about. Cancer Rocks.
I got some much craved protein introduced into my diet after the 5th day. I got to eat small chunks of my best beloved potato, one of the outlawed veggies in the first act of this 3 week program. MsB comes to our humble abode to demonstrate how to cook the meals, give us tips and answer our many questions. It’s been a while since I sat on a chair in my kitchen, watching someone show me how to cook. I got to eat rice pasta with tomatoes. This period of not being able to eat, what has become part of my life over the years, somehow allowed me to appreciate taste and texture all over again when they were introduced back into my diet.
A soft boiled egg for breakfast was what I craved most so I did a simple rice and egg breakfast. Here is how to make your own. We must concentrate on the ritual of boiling these liquid chickens. The eggs must be boiled for exactly 3 minutes. Take a spoon and recover the eggs from the boiling water to stop the cooking process. Run them under some cold water to cool our lovelies enough to handle.
Heat a little precooked white basmati rice. The eggs get a proper whack with a knife and their golden hearts lavishly oozed over the warm rice. A good grind of course black pepper kissed with a baby pinch of your favourite salt. I would have loved a splash of chopped scallions on top for colour and crunch but we were out.
Each bite will seem better than the last.
So, my silent reader, go hug your brother. I plan to update every Saturday as long as I am up for it.

My cancer opens a whole new door.

2011-01-15T08:36:00.000-08:00

Well it has been a week of Cancer Rocks. I am learning so much during this process. The support of family, friends and acquaintances has been overwhelming, touching and encouraging.
I had my first appointment with the oncologist on Thursday this week at the British Columbia Cancer Agency. My doctor, Sharlene Gill, is not only a senior caregiver but also associate professor of medicine at the University of British Columbia. She knows what she is talking about and puts all the information out to me in ways I can understand and absorb.
She recommended chemo and planed to admit me on Monday for the first treatment so they can monitor my side effects. The other treatments would be as an outpatient.
But, and here comes the hard part, my silent reader, she said the chemo could only hope to enhance the quality of my life because at this stage of my cancer there was no hope for a cure. Here prognosis is she thinks I have 3-4 months to live.
Friday I spoke to her on the phone and we have agreed to postpone the chemo but I have since decided not to have chemo. There is no hope for a cure and I feel too week. I have already registered with palliative care. I have not given up, but given in to the cancer.
MrD is busy with his alternative treatments for me and we will go from here.

On the lighter side, my silent reader, having cancer has opened up a whole new world.
A few examples are.

You can once again fit into any of your old clothes.

You attend a social meet up where home made pastry is included. You are sure to get offered the choice of leftovers.

Your spouse cuts way back on your “to do” list.

After all these years of saying no because it is fattening, you are encouraged to eat the crispy brown chicken skin.

You need not pass up on the desert.

It is fun to pretend there is a friendly alien hiding in you guts.

Sometimes it feels important to take a day off away from people stuffing you full of healthy food. It just reminds you that you are ill.

Folks want to take you out for lunch more and most insist on paying the bill.

Being on this “get fat” diet means you get to eat food you had deprived yourself. I ate poutine for the first time in ten years.

You get appointments to meet new people in new places you have never been.

You take time to stop and smell the roses.

Cancer Rocks

2011-01-08T09:22:00.000-08:00

One whole week has passed, my silent reader, since the news of the Trophy H and “The Big C”. It has been a most amazing time where old friends,lovers and relatives have made an effort to get in touch by phone, email or Face Book. They all sent their greetings, prayers and best wishes for my battle with cancer and we got a chance to catch up a bit on what was happening in their lives.
I still have not seen an oncologist. My first meeting at Vancouver Cancer Center is this Thursday. I was not informed at the time whether I should come prepared with an overnight bag so I am assuming it will be just a meet and greet with the specialist in charge of my case. She will give me her expert opinion and hopefully we will get started on path to treatment. Vancouver Cancer Center is one of the few hospitals in the world that offer alternative forms of cancer treatment separately or in conjunction with chemo or radiology. I have my skinny fingers crossed for a couple of weeks of say maybe, shopping therapy?
I have managed to put on some of the weight I lost while in hospital doing all the tests leading up to all this. MrD must get full credit for this. He has been working overload, running the empire and shopping and cooking. He is constantly bringing me smoothies or snacks and watches over me to insure I consume everything. Now I don’t look so much like a ghoul. I make little forays outside to get some exercise and have developed my own style of walking slowly, like I am contemplating life, rather that just too ill to walk faster.
I am learning new things every day. I am learning to let go of some control, ask for help when I need it and sharpen my sense of humour. Today I am particularly grateful because I am celebrating 6 months of sobriety.

Happy New Year from MrD and the Trophy H

2010-12-31T08:58:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year from MrD and the Trophy H. This last year has been a lot of
giggles for me writing this tongue in cheek blog to dish some dirt, present some tasty food ideas, give a few travel tips and hopefully add a smile or a chuckle or two to your day.
This year, my silent reader, I am changing topics and heading into more exciting waters.
There is no great way to get this news out there but here goes for trying.
Four days before Christmas I was diagnosed with colon cancer that has spread to my
liver. How cool is that? Cancer Rocks!
I had been in hospital for a week and a half getting fast tracked through a lot of tests. Some of those tests involving chemically emptied colons and live cameras on site in places that should never be visited by operating rooms full of people one does not know. A wee bit nasty and uncomfortable.
I haven't been a patient in hospital since I was in my mid twenties, having my nose done. It took more time getting used to strangers walking in at all hours with
concerned professional smiles wanting to stick long sharp needles in my arms or take my temperature and blood pressure for the hundredth time.
December 20, I got the official reports after a conference with the medical
Team. I was given a discharge and sent home with MrD to celebrate the holidays.
MrD has been a pillar of strength and support through all this but when he heard the “Big C” word he collapsed. In the Philippines, where he grew up, there were and still are relatively fewer survivors. In MrD’s head he was already picking out a good blue suit and a box.
Because it was the holiday season there was no way they could get me into the Cancer
Center until January. I have since been notified that my first appointment is January13. In the mean time my goal is to get my strength back after that barrage of invasive testing. I lost a lot of weight I need to put back on my bones. I will need some reserves to combat the chemo treatments.
A recent report comparing six first world countries found that Canada rated tops in cancer survivors and British Columbia ranked the highest in the land. I have every right to feel optimistic.
You might recall, my silent reader, I always maintain a positive outlook on life and a sense of humour to get me through tough times. I am in great spirits and ready for a fabulous new year. None of us know the future. Often what we perceive to be horrible devastating news turns out down the road to be one of the best things that ever happened to us.
The only sad part is right now I will not be able to spend time back at our home in Asia, getting massages on the beach while I suck back fresh local mango and banana shakes.
That will be something to look forward to down the long and winding road.

Do's and Don'ts of partner squabbling.

2010-11-08T07:13:00.000-08:00

People love it when Trophy H’s have a bad day. Everyone thinks oh boy this guy is funny enough to laugh himself over to tomorrow. Little people like to see the myths and giants, if not fall flat, then at least bent out of shape by the wind.
Trophy H’s have really bad days.
We have real fights with our partner that is not stage material.
Here is how I have dealt with some of mine.
Trophy H’s make lousy fighters. We want to make jokes so the angry person being silently mean to you from another room or on the phone from another time zone in another country will return from ugly land. Is your squabble happening with text or real talk, or is your partner right there standing in front of Glee or your favourite hockey game, which ever daddy programming turns your crank.
One thing you attempt to never do when you are having a bad fight with your partner is to laugh. They sometimes take laughter too personal during fights.
There is no good time to laugh. Not while they are staring you in the eye shaking the scissors and a handful of your more favourable credit cards.
Jokes are wasted and unwise during any bitterness or tension in the room.
Jokes tend to either go right over their head when they are cussing out your sorry ass. They for sure will only make you laugh, but not them.
“Hey you are not really angry with me darlink. You are just taking this opportunity to express your inner ugly.” Seriously don’t try this at home, my silent reader.
No way. Real men know how to win and get back to the TV. They understand the bigger picture. We know to keep our eyes not on the TV, at least during the commercials, but at those angry eyes. We nod our head up and down like those made in China neck wobbling car dogs you buy from Canadian Tire. Ok here the trophy H must make a confession. I have never owned a head nodding dog or a dashboard on which to put one.
No helpful interventions or comments. This would not be a good time to mention, and for their own good really, “Now pumpkin. Screwing up your eyes like that does not improve your advancing wrinkle war. The smile and frown all happens down below the ice line.”

Trophy H tips #459863. Become a skilled head nodder. Casually vary the speed of the nod to make it appear sincere.
Trophy H tips # 45697. Listen to what they are telling you without just pretending to listen while you make up your rebuttal in your cutting fashion.
The beauty of being the Trophy H of MrD is we really don’t have fights like this anymore. We worked threw a lot of shit in the first 5 years of this 15 year tour we are on together. And he has never been foolish enough to pull the money card during an argument. He is impeccably trained. Now when he has been bad or nasty or harsh or just plain honest and he sees I have been hurt by his action or words. He has an old saying that brings us back to reality. “15 years and my husband is not used to me yet.”
Trophy H tip #5768 Never go to bed to sleep when you are angry and never let them sleep while you are angry.

The holiday in Hell.

2010-10-13T10:49:00.000-07:00

Thanksgiving has always been one of the few family holidays that I enjoy. There seems to be less hysterical drama and just fun times eating lovely traditional foods with family and friends.
Last year about this time my uncle and aunt, MrG and MsC suggested that they fly out from their nest in Northern Ontario, we pick up his sister in North Vancouver, and the 5 of us spend the holiday weekend in the beautiful surroundings of Terrace Beach Resort in the wilds of Ucluelet on the far side of Vancouver Island. Because I am the Trophy H and I did have a year to prepare I happily agreed and started making reservations. The resort was built by Jason Priestly of Hollywood 90210 fame and I managed to reserve the biggest cabin assuming that that would be the one Jason stayed in when he was home. It had three floors of lovely wooden luxury with large outdoor decks, Jacuzzis, fireplaces and a well designed and equipped kitchen for me to wow our guests with my special brunches, lunches and dinners.
My uncle and aunt used their carefully gathered air mile points to book their return tickets. His sister got the weekend off and MrD agreed to come with us because the resort promised Internet connection so he could run the empire while we all sat and chatted or went for long walks in the stunning natural surroundings.
That was what should have happened. This is what did happen.
Things went smoothly in the beginning. My uncle’s sister uses a cane and has some difficulty getting in and out of vehicles but with me carrying the extra luggage we managed to get on board at the early hour and made our ferry connection to the island.
From Departure Bay at Nanaimo to the resort in Ucluelet it rained the whole way so we did not get a chance to enjoy the scenery. We did stop at the giant Douglas fir forest called the Cathedral Trees for a stretch and a drippy camera opportunity. The trip took about 4 hours but we made it seem fun.
At the check in we found out that the cabin I had reserved there was no Internet connection because of the building materials used in the walls. MrD was not amused and made it known that I was responsible. Okay. I had to rent an extra cabin that did have Internet connection and I just whipped out the credit card with a non existent smile.
I got the keys and managed to get my guests safely to their rooms. It was raining the whole time. The resort is built into a rain forest with walkways and stairs. The lady with the cane made it all the way. The biggest cabin was the farthest from the entrance with the most privacy.
I put away all the food supplies I had brought from Granville Island Market, ran back to MrD’s new cabin to check up that he managed to connect and I dropped off my own bag.
I returned to accompany my uncle to the next town in the rental van so we could pick up some milk they wanted for their breakfast tea.
On the way to the van from the cabin we were passed on the walkway by a family with small children. My uncle and I stepped aside to let them pass and he slipped and fell. My uncle could not move or get up. I alerted my aunt about the accident. Someone got the message to the staff in the office. They called 911 and about 45 minutes later the ambulance arrived. All this time the rain never let up. We had blankets keeping my uncle warm and a sheet of plastic covering him to try and keep him as comfortable as possible.
The ambulance attendants assessed the situation. They put a pillow splint on his broken leg. We managed to get him lifted into a stretcher chair and all strapped in. Then we had to get him off the walkway, through the bush along a gravel trail and into the ambulance for the 40 kilometre ride to the nearest hospital in Tofino. All this happened in the rain.
My uncle was the only person insured to drive the rental van so my aunt needed to contact the rental company before we could follow the ambulance to the hospital. Many phone calls later and after heated chats with operators working in Delhi, India, we just gave up, said just make a note and off we drove uninsured to the hospital emergency rooms.
There was of course a lengthy waiting time before some one came out and explained the situation to us. My uncle’s leg was indeed broken in two places, below the knee and above the ankle. He would need an operation that could not be done at the small hospital in Tofino so in the morning the ambulance would have to transport him to the bigger hospital in Nanaimo, the city where we had arrived by ferry that was 4 hours away.
Okay.
This meant that we would have to pack up all our things at the resort, forfeit the prepaid two nights for the two rooms, drive the 4 hours to Nanaimo, rent two more rooms.
Okay.
The staff and owner of the resort were in top form and concern for us all along this ordeal and when I checked us out the next morning the owner assured me that all charges for our rooms for both nights would be cancelled and I was to keep him informed about my uncle’s progress.
We found the hospital in Nanaimo, I got us nice rooms at a hotel near the harbour and we managed to find some turkey dinner specials at a mediocre restaurant chain.
The next morning when we returned to the hospital we found out that if they did operate on my uncle there then he would have to remain in Nanaimo for about two weeks for the follow up. This was not an option so they put a temporary cast on his injured leg. My uncle needed three different medicines and a new pair of crutches. This being the holiday weekend some pharmacies were closed and after a wild goose chase in a city I was not familiar with we managed to visit 3 pharmacies and get all we needed.
MrD and the lady with the cane wanted to return to the city so we got them out of the way and on their way before my aunt and I started the ordeal of getting my injured uncle out of the hospital, into the van, get the van onto the crowded holiday ferry and back to Vancouver. We had to line up at the ferry docks because our reservation we had made was not valid for the time we got my uncle to the docks. We had to wait for 4 ½ hours to get onto a boat. My uncle could not leave the van. I won’t go into details about how he remained comfortable but those urinals the drugstore sells really come in handy.
Finally late at night we returned from our holiday to our condo in Vancouver and we managed to get my exhausted aunt and uncle upstairs and into bed so they could get some rest before the ordeal of flying home the next morning.
In the morning MrD and I got my uncle back in the van with my aunt and their entire luggage. We went with them to the airport. My uncle had to purchase a new ticket on business class because he could not fit in his economy seat with the giant leg cast.
Finally we said good bye to our despondent relatives at security and the airline handlers wheeled my uncle away with my aunt following along waving good bye.
I breathed a giant sigh of relief I did not know I needed. The stress had just built up inside and I spent the rest of the day in a daze.
Yes it was the holiday in Hell but in spite of everything we managed to keep our cool and bond in ways we surely had not planned.
Still it might have been fun to have just had a boring weekend with a book and some pate the way we had planned but the Trophy H, my silent reader, thankfully even at Thanksgiving, knows how to adapt.

Fern Alley Market Farm Trophy H Pesto

2010-09-24T08:42:00.000-07:00

Last week I bought my regular supply of spicy greens from John the salad guy at the local farmers market on Granville Island. This past week MrD and I not only munched our way through a half bag of the crisp green mouth happiness but I used the leaves instead of basil to make pesto. The spiciness of the peppery mustard greens, arugula and several other designer yum notes proved a perfect base for a walnut, rather than pine nut, pesto. I used the traditional notes of garlic, olive oil and Parmesan cheese for the taste and texture but to give it that Trophy H kick I added fresh ginger.
Next market day I brought John some of the pesto for him and his mom who was back working on the farm. This gentle quiet farmer or his delightful mom drives 80 K from their farm, Fern Alley Market Farms, in Upper Squamish Valley to bring Vancouverites amazing exotic greens in the top of their prime. It was a thrill to give back with some home made pesto.
Here’s how to make your own.
2 cups spicy salad greens
1 clove of peeled garlic
½ cup toasted unsalted walnuts
1 slice of peeled fresh ginger
½ cup grated Parmesan cheese
½ cup olive oil
Salt and Pepper
Add all the ingredients into a blender and work into a smooth paste
Cover in a bit more olive oil to keep the paste from losing its colour and store in the fridge in a container with a tight lid if you are not going to use it right away.
Trophy H tip # 473. Don’t just use pesto for pasta. It works perfectly as a spread on sandwiches, a base for salad dressing or soup with some zing.

Crab apple and roasted corn salsa.

2010-09-19T07:21:00.000-07:00

The tartness of seasonal crab apples goes very well with the sweetness of roasted corn. Don’t peel the apples so the salsa has more colours. Roughly cut the cored apples into the same size as the roasted corn kernels. Add some crisp red onion, a handful of chopped carrots and lots of fresh coriander to make this simple but sensational salsa. Dress the salsa with salt and pepper, olive oil and some spicy vinegar, then give the whole thing a quick stir and it’s good to go. Keep this in the fridge and you can use it for a week. I used some to add to my duck sausage pasta sauce and MrD is still licking his chops and nodding thanks.

No Fuss Fussily.

2010-09-18T09:53:00.000-07:00

Fall finds MrD and me back home in Vancouver enjoying my kitchen after three weeks away eating out of hotel kitchens. I have missed the local ingredients from my beloved Granville Island market. This Trophy H pasta is not only easy to whip up in a pinch but it would be good enough to feed to your Italian granny if you had one.
Fry some sliced chorizo sausage and red onions with a handfull of green peas until the sausage is browned and cooked through all the way. Throw in a handful of chopped fresh asparagus for some colour and added crunch. Stir everything for another minute just to cook the asparagus but not kill it. Take the pan off the heat and stir in a serving of chopped smoked salmon. Add all this to some fussily or penne and coat with a generous serving of basil and cream sauce and some salt and pepper to taste. Garnish with soft goat cheese crumbles and a few sprigs of fresh oregano. Your guests will lick their bowl and then wash it. Who could ask for anything more?

Trophy H Peach Salsa

2010-09-02T20:33:00.000-07:00

Make this easy winner a day ahead of time. The flavours improve by hanging out and this seasonal side will be one thing out the way before your guests arrive.
Here’s how.
Chop two pealed peaches into small cubes. Save the peach pits aside for some crafting project. In a bowl add the fruit with 1 teaspoon each of chopped ginger and garlic. Finely dice one Thai bird’s eye chili without the seeds, a few sprigs of chopped mint and thin slices of mild red onion to add some bite and texture. Squeeze the juice of ½ a lime and add that with the lime zest over the salsa. Splash everything with a good slosh of decent olive oil and a pinch of crunchy red Hawaiian salt or a few shakes of plain white salt. Stir in everything gently so as not to bruise the peaches and store in the fridge until you are ready to serve.
I prefer to eat this salsa at room temperature but MrD, my silent reader, claims my spicy Trophy H peaches work just as well served up either hot or cold.

Philippines Paradise Papaya Pickles. Achara.

2010-09-02T10:03:00.001-07:00

Here, my silent reader is your peaceful path to papaya pickle paradise.
This morning I made green papaya and carrot pickles, my Trophy H version of a Filipino favourite called achara and traditionally served as a side with many of their fried savoury dishes. The sourness of palm vinegar with the dark sweetness of palm sugar sets off a surprising mouthful of crunches with the carrots and green papaya. If you can’t find green papaya just use carrots or maybe try hicama.
To make your own quart jar of pickles grate or finely chop half a seeded green mango with about the same amount of carrots. Traditionally Filipinos would only use 5% carrot as a bit of colour in the mix but today I want a new batch with more carrots. OK I am clearing out the vegetable drawer before we fly out tomorrow and I wanted to use up all the carrots. Together in a sauce pan heat 2 cups of palm vinegar with 1 cup of palm sugar and a teaspoon of pickling spices until the sugar completely dissolves. Plain white vinegar and plain white sugar works just as well, my silent reader. Sterilize a clean mason jar in boiling water and filled the empty bottle to the top with the carrots and mango mixed with a handful of raisins. Top off the jar with the hot vinegar and seal with a tight lid. Stand the bottle upside down to cool and then store in the refrigerator. These are worth waiting for. Leave for at least a week but a month is better. I have to hide my achara behind things in the fridge or MrD will whine for me to open them now. MrD has family visiting from Manila in October and I look forward to sharing some of these flavours from home.
Pickles are easy to make. Don’t tell your guests. They will think you are some super hero.
Make your self a batch of these show stopping papaya paradise pickles and open them up to serve alongside your award winning Thanksgiving turkey. The guests will be the ones giving thanks and it will all be to you and of course your pal the Trophy H.

Trophy H Dish of the Day, August 31, 2010.

2010-08-31T09:35:00.000-07:00

The Trophy H Lisa Peach Layer.

MrM and MsL, MrD’s and my own long time acquaintances from Texas came to visit on Sunday. This seasonal peach and salmon appetizer was an easy no fuss no muss and tasty way to start the dining. I have named this simple show stopper after the Lovely MsL. My menu featured two contrasting terrines. The Marvellous MrM’s version got layered roasted peaches with ham and pecorino cheese.

Here’s how.
Inside a metal ring form settle some sliced uncooked peaches with thin slices of the best wild smoked salmon you can source and some fresh goat cheese.

Trophy H kitchen tip #???. Make your own ring form rather than buying one of those 30 dollar rings with a fancy label on it from a kitchen store.

I built this terrine up inside a ring form I made from cutting both ends out of an empty tin can. Tuna fish cans are great. If you make your own tin can version, my silent reader, make sure you bend back the sharp lid edges inside the can so you don’t get injured. Save one of the ends of the can to help release the contents when you are ready to plate.

Start with a layer of the fresh peaches. I skinned the peaches for this version but normally I would leave the skins on for a bit of colour and texture. Add salmon. I used sliced salmon because that is what I had but you, my silent reader, could use salmon ends which I imagine would be cheaper but just as suitable for this dish. After the first layer of salmon add some crumpled goat cheese. I used a plain local cheese, a bit on the soft side, but with no herbs or cute hippy extras. Next I added another layer of salmon and a last few slices of the peaches.
The beauty of this appetizer is it can be made a few hours in advance, so when your own MrD or your guests arrive and its time to plate, you just grab it out of the refrigerator. Remove the terrine by using the tin can lid or a spatula to press out the food onto a cutting board. Slice into wedges like a pie and plate on a bit of micro greens. Throw on a tiny heirloom tomato or three. Splash a tear or two of your really good olive oil over the whole dish. Our guests brought us the best olive oil in Texas but more on that next time.
Then all you need to do is eat enjoy and sit back while the crowd roars your name.

Romer's Burger Bar

2010-08-24T17:39:00.000-07:00

Last month’s burger at the Gathering Place Community Center where I was doing community service in the kitchen was a tasty deal for $2.75 and worth every subsidised penny. This month found me at Romer’s Burger Bar in Kitsalano on West 4th Ave. in Vancouver. I’d read a promising revue in some travel magazine and you, silent reader, knows the Trophy H is always open for suggestions as to where to find good meat. I ordered the customer’s choice called the “Man’s Man Burger”. Sounds like one for the Trophy H I thought. Simple ingredients like apple wood smoked bacon, local cheddar and onion strings sound promising but they all arrive on a brioche bun a bit too large for the size of the patty. The server did not ask me how I like my burger cooked and it was a little too cooked for my liking. There was no pink there to savour. The deep fried onion slivers were not greasy nor were they warm. The tomato slice was thin enough to go unnoticed on my chew meter and the cheddar was fairly nondescript. I guess the bacon was fine but I don’t remember much of it. I think there was a slice of pickle lost somewhere in the shuffle. There was some garlic mayo on the well toasted bun but either there was no kick to it or just not enough to notice. I was left wondering why it was there in the first place on this $11.00 quite regular burger. The $3.00 side of double cooked fries with sea salt were double cooked well enough but over salted with sea salt that was ground so fine it might have just been the regular salt out of the shaker.
Sadly, my silent reader, for this Trophy H, when my next month’s burger craving comes around I won’t be heading to Romer’s. Romer’s three star burger with a side of salty fries clocked in at $15.68 not including tip. Take your Dad but not your date.

Back in Manila

2010-08-17T17:02:00.001-07:00

So sorry it has been ages since I have updated this blog. MrD and I recently returned to Manila for another stay at our tropical palace. It has been a long couple of months since we have been back so it is good to be home and chewing on some decent mangoes again. I packed a whole suitcase of food stuffs in Vancouver because I planned to cook a dinner for our staff here at home. Our office here in Manila is located on the ground floor of the condo unit where we live. My birthday was coming up, more on that sacred event in a moment. Every year around this time if we are in town, we usually take our staff to the Manila Shangri-La Hotel to enjoy their world class five star buffet but this year MrD requested that I cook at home and invite the staff upstairs. We had several new staff that had never been to visit and it was time to bring them all home. So I filled my check in bag with a 5 kilo ham and veggies you can’t find in the tropics like parsnips, turnips and sweet potatoes. I gathered a dozen or so of my favourite local artisan cheeses, three different varieties of pesto and other treats I knew were not available here on this island paradise. I knew from past experience that check in bags travel down in the hold where it is quite cold enough to keep everything fresh enough until we got here and there is no customs control like most countries here in the Philippines. You could bring in panda steaks and humming bird pate if you had the notion. I did not need the space in my luggage for regular things like clothing and toiletries because I already have all that here at home in Manila.
Dinner was a success but our staff is very easy to please when it comes to eating. They just require lots and lots of food and then just stand back and let them go at it until it all disappears.
The day after the dinner party MrD and I flew off to our island getaway of Boracay. You my silent reader may remember my last trip there when I met the dreaded black banded sea krait and lived to write about it. This time a typhoon just to the north was ongoing. The island storms were very dramatic with the palm trees doing their Gilligan’s Island impersonations. The famous white sand beach totally disappeared under the waves. The water was right up to the tree line. The whole side of the island exposed to the winds had been barricaded with plastic and bamboo screens to keep all those tacky coconut souvenirs from blowing off to our Chinese neighbours to the north.
I love the island when it’s stormy like this but some of the hordes of tourists, mostly from Korea, did not seem quite as excited. It rained a lot but a warm tropical rain and there was no lightning so I went swimming in the torrential downpours. I noticed one tourist standing waist deep in our hotel pool in the rain holding an umbrella over her head. Nice image but a bit confusing.
Alas we only had 3 nights of peace away before we needed to return to Manila. But it was good to be back and say hello to my Filipino home away from home.
Back in the city I needed to go to the National Bureau of Investigation, the Filipino version of the FBI to obtain police clearance documentation so I can apply for a new class of visa. Every year since we moved here I have had to get a working visa which I can because together with MrD we own companies here and hire enough locals to fit the requirements but it is a long involved process requiring lawyers and endless documents. Now because I am …of a certain age…I can apply for a retirement visa which in the beginning is just as tiresome to apply for but will eventually allow me more freedom to enter and exit the country.
I won’t go into the traumatic events of the long endless lineups only to be told we had to go to another office with even longer lineups on the fifth floor of the worst fire trap mall in all of Asia. Long story short. I got my clearance after three excursions into bureaucratic hell and all I need now is to deposit a king’s ransom of American cash into a Filipino bank and they will eventually, after a million more documents, allow me a retirement visa.
On a lighter note, your Trophy H has turned another year older and wiser. We invited MrD’s family for lunch. I refused to cook. I have cooked for that crowd very often but I insisted that this year I wanted the day off. We went to the weekend market early on the Saturday morning and bought Filipino prepared foods like chicken empatido, pork barbecue, seafood rice, roasted corn and other local favourites. I had ordered the giant flour less chocolate cake from the Manila Shangri-La that I have raved about in previous blogs. This beauty weighed in at about 5 kilos. Just think giant chocolate ganache truffle and you get the idea. I served up all the guests each a tiny slice and kept lots for me to enjoy later.
The in-laws loved the food, ate as much as they could and brought the rest of it home. I kept my eye on the leftover cake though so they couldn’t make off with that beauty. MrD left the next morning and is back home in Vancouver where I will fly off to join him again this coming Saturday. In the mean time I am getting much needed massage therapy, eating as many mangoes as I can stuff into me and working my way through all the rest of that delicious cake.

Frozen Fruit Yogurt Desert

2010-07-26T15:06:00.000-07:00

Summer time and the living is easy. My Canadian friends are complaining about the heat. I just feel like MrD and I are back home in Manila. Of course it is more humid there but the heat is similar.
The best thing about the heat is cooling off with some home made frozen deserts and here are a couple of ideas for super fast and always easy frozen fruit and yogurt recipes. I keep several kinds of fruit in the freezer compartment of my refrigerator so I have some handy ingredients when I need a fast desert or a cool down snack.
Just add a couple of scoops of frozen fruit in a food processor or blender and add enough low fat yogurt and a little fruit juice so the mixture blends evenly. I often use frozen bananas which are very sweet so you don’t need extra sweetener but sometimes a splash or two of maple syrup is added to bring out the sweetness of the berries and add a dimension of flavour. This kind of frozen desert works best made on demand and eaten right away but in a time crunch you can do it before your guests arrive and leave it sit in the freezer until you need to serve it.
The two examples in the photos are frozen blueberries with cherry yogurt and the other is frozen mango, banana and fresh cranberries blended with lemon yogurt. Remember these fruits are frozen, not fresh so the desert comes out frozen.
Next time I want to try frozen banana and peanut butter with a spoon of nutella and plain yogurt.

Granville Island Public Market

2010-07-19T09:22:00.000-07:00

I had thought I would be updating this week from Moncton, New Brunswick but MrD and I have postponed our eastern excursion until September. So, it’s Vancouver this week. I think it’s time for a tourist report from my favourite local market.
Having a bountiful market is a true gift I value, having lived and traveled in so many lands where food is not only scarce but definitely not of the best quality. We Canadians are blessed and fortunate. No one actually needs twenty eight varieties of organic wild game salami and twelve varieties of potatoes, but I ain’t complaining.
Granville Island Market, Vancouver’s perfect place for fresh local ingredients, is a source of many of my Trophy H dinners. Here is where I go to find wild mushrooms, game meats and spectacular sea food. Once a week I take a water taxi across to the island and do my shopping to stock up the pantry. I usually also buy an armload of flowers and a gooey cinnamon bun for MrD who stays home to run the empire while I do the marketing.
My Trophy H tips for visiting Granville Island Public Market is to go in the morning so you can be there when it opens at 9 am. I go on Thursdays. All the produce coming in for the weekend has arrived so you are getting first choice of the finest wares. The market just gets too crowded for actual shopping later when the tourists flock in to ogle our super salmon, salivate at our fat sausages and try to sneak photos of me in one of my stunning, get out of my road, outfits. Avoid the weekends and the inevitable crowds. If its not the food you are shopping for, but all that other artsy stuff, then you need to know that most galleries open at 11am.
Granville Island Public Market is a must for both the serious cook and tourists with their digital cameras and all that holiday vacationer cash to spend. It is the place for me to meet other chefs from around town. We compare notes on what is fresh and in season. We share tips and ideas. The dealers often grill us on what we plan to make with their ingredients. Sometimes we bring them tastes and recipes with our thanks.
The market has ample place to sit and relax with a cup of java and a new found pastry friend. You can eat well in the noisy packed food court or brown bag it with your finds and go outside, sit down and enjoy one of the best views of Vancouver. Mind not to feed those pesky birds.
Have a great week, my silent reader, of shopping, cooking and sharing food with friends.

2010-07-12T10:09:00.000-07:00

Last week’s guests have gone home and MrD and I are adjusting to scaffolding set up in our great room. About 3 months ago the workers renovating our upstairs neighbour’s condo damaged a major water pipe that created a trail of disaster for 18 floors. I was back home in Manila when all that happened but fortunately MrD was here to handle the immediate mess. Because the flooding affected so many units a disaster team was called in to do the whole job for all the units. The results are such that three months later workmen are finally here on site fixing up the dry wall. The ceiling in that room is 21 feet high so they had to install scaffolding. I am told the industrial monkey bars will in all likelihood be set up for about two weeks while they dry wall and then paint and texture. This weekend I took advantage of the equipment and had a ceiling fan installed to circulate some of this rare hot air summer has brought us.
In spite of the chaos I keep putting meals on the table for MrD. Here are this week’s three easy to prepare dishes that even you, my silent reader can make on your own.
The heat of summer always seems to keep my hunger level down. The higher the temperature the less time I want to spend chewing food. Salads, sandwiches and nibbles are perfect summer choices.
At this time of year so many of the local tomatoes are being featured at the markets. I found some perfect tiny yellow miniatures that are packed full of flavour. I sliced these babies up, added some fresh herbs, salt and pepper, tossed them with capers in a light vinaigrette and served them as both a salad and a topping for a puffed pastry tart. Puff pastry is not a difficult thing to work with. You buy it frozen in your grocery store and let it thaw out a couple of hours before you roll it out. Don’t have a rolling pin? Use a wine bottle.
In this heat I like to serve chicken drummettes as nibble finger foods. This version I divided the wings into 4 groups and mixed different rubs for each pile. Then, I just baked them all in the same oven at 350 F or 175 C for 45 to 50 minutes. The baby drums are perfect hot or cold. You can use your favourite marinades for the chicken. I used pesto for one of the marinades, spicy hot curry for another, maple syrup and ancho chili powder with lots of black pepper for the third variety and some sun dried tomato paste with balsamic vinegar and mustard for the fourth flavour. Go wild with the combinations but don’t use too many ingredients or the taste gets lost.
I hope this summer weather holds for a bit. Canadians are an entirely different race of people in the warmer season than they are in those colder darker wet months.

Happy Canada Day Eh?

2010-07-01T14:37:00.000-07:00

Every patriot loves his home land. I lived abroad for 20 years and every July 1st a bell would go off in my mental files. Bling. Canada. This year MrD and I are celebrating the big day in Vancouver with guests. My much older and wiser brother, MrR and his charming wife, MsA, are visiting for 5 days from their frontier homeland estate back east in the northern wilds of Ontario.
Local artisan cheeses and breads served us as our breakfast celebration. Then we were off to the docks on Hornby Street to catch a ferry to Grandville Island for a quick shop before the crush of tourists arrives. It is perfect July 1 weather, too cold for a mass of tourists. It doesn’t take me long to get what I need from the market. I have a mental list of what I want and where to get it and the crowds tend to part and give me room. Today I was shopping for the last of the fresh wild morels in season. I imagine you are tired, my silent reader, of my morels as much as you might be tired of my morals. MrD will not be sorry when I stop feeding him these tasty fungus treats. But MrR and MsA love morels as much as I do, so they are getting them at every meal.
Tonight I am serving wild cold smoked salmon rolled up with goat cheese and morel puree for the appetizer. MrD is a teeny bit tired of salmon, goat cheese or morels so he is getting wild boar pancetta with some pecorino cheese. MrR and MsA don’t eat pork so things all work out balance wise. To go with my Trophy H Canadian theme menu for tonight’s meal the main course will be braised Alberta beef short ribs in a maple syrup adobo sauce. The sides to serve nestled beside my ribs will be snow peas, smashed fireworks red potatoes and of course morels. Desert will be some of my Trophy H hand baked fig and maple baklava. Then we all head down to the sea shore to watch the fireworks.
We all have an early flight to the Yukon in the morning to continue the festivities. I will update next time with news of our northern journey but in the mean time here are today’s recipes.
Smoked Salmon Rolls.
Layer 8 - 10 smoked salmon slices on plastic wrap.
Spread an even mixture of goat cheese and morel mushroom pate over the salmon layer leaving a half inch of salmon on the long side. Roll up the salmon into a tight roll and refrigerate for at least 4 hours before slicing.
Beef Short Ribs.
Coat generous sized cuts of beef short ribs with a morel BBQ sauce and put them in a slow cooker. Cover with a splash each of Soy sauce, Worcestershire, apple cider vinegar and about ¼ cup of maple syrup. Cook on low for 4 hours.
Cut small stars on opposite sides of some small new red potatoes and boil until fork tender. Cool and then gently smash into flattened ovals with the stars on each of the flat sides. Fry these in hot olive oil or duck fat until brown and crispy.
Saute some sliced morel mushrooms in a little butter with salt and pepper.
Steam snow peas in their shell. Serve the potatoes, mushrooms and peas as the sides for the ribs.
I made my Trophy H secret recipe fig and maple baklava for desert because I am the Trophy H. You, my silent reader, don’t have to go to all that much work.

It's burger time.

2010-06-21T07:03:00.000-07:00

OK I have good news and bad news about this month’s burger. You, my silent reader, will remember my blog about a month ago when I reviewed my once a month burger fix. I gave Vancouver’s “The Two Parrots” four out of five stars for a tasty slab of the red stuff.
Well, as you know, I only allow myself one burger a month, so here is the good news. I have discovered the best burger in Vancouver. The bad news is I am not going to tell you where you can find it. If I do that the restaurant might become just too popular if my fans find out I eat there. It’s only a small ‘brassiere’ on Davie Street. I want to be sure to always get a table. I don’t like to wait on tables. That’s what a waiter does. Did that. Done that. My therapist helps me forget all about it.
About a week ago I stopped to read their menu posted outside their kitchen window. (I actually stopped to watch them cook but pretended to read the menu.) I saw ‘Burger’ and my once a month burger alarm went off. I read about white cheddar, bacon and truffle aioli and my heart rate went up with anticipation.
So I convinced MrD I should take him there so he could buy me lunch. We went at an early hour to get seated before the rush and were greeted by a very helpful and equally charming Megan. She welcomed us and updated us on the specials of the day. The lobster bisque with spot prawns set off my taste bud alerts and at only 6 loonies but I was a trophy husband on a mission and that was to eat my monthly burger. I begged Megan to bring me one forthwith and put me out of my craving misery.
MrD went for the moules et frites because he can speak French.
Megan soon enough returned with generous pots of frites for MrD and fries for moi. I know I said I can’t find a decent French fry in Vancouver but I promise I will no longer say that. The fries at this place, that I am not going to mention, are nearly as good as my own. Close enough to have made me want to eat them all.
Now it’s on to the real deal. The burger was actually better than my own because I did not have to do the work that went into this perfect big bite of burger bliss. The soft bun was toasted. The generous meat patty was grilled perfectly to my taste. On top of that was some truffle aioli hidden under bacon so tender, but crisp at the same time. Working my way up this mountain of meat joy were some of the best deep fried onions that ever slipped by my taste buds. Just under the top of the bun I found a tasteful garnish of some fresh salad greens.
Served on the side were tiny ramekins of house made mayonnaise and ketchup. When was the last time you ordered a burger and it came with ketchup the chef made? I hate ketchup. I never eat it. You know that, my silent reader, from a previous blog. No longer true. This tomato treat had just a hint of anise and was not too sweet like our pal the red muck in a bottle. Perfect ketchup with those fries but the burger was good to go as it was. And I ate the whole thing. I won’t bother you with all the details of how juicy and fabulous this five star burger tasted but I don’t imagine I will look elsewhere again next month if I am in Vancouver for my next burger fix. I will just return to Megan and this nameless small brassiere on Davie Street in Vancouver.

Father's Day Suggestions.

2010-06-13T12:27:00.001-07:00

Who is your MrD? Who’s your daddy? Big D Day is only a week away. That means only 168 more shopping hours before you get to give your own special Daddy that extra fabulous something. Let’s all make more of an effort this year to show that someone we care about that they are practically as important as you are yourself.
Here are a few of my Trophy H tips to help you, my silent reader, to make your special someone so happy he might even put you back in his will.
Go big, go bling is my word on the fashion news stand this summer. Outfit your man from head to toe in comfort without sacrificing gorgeous style. I suggest a French burka with mosquito netting in a tasteful black and bling contrast. For that out doors man of the house, my button camouflage hunting jacket. Sulphur is the new black. Buy Daddy anything in this hot summer colour and stand back because Daddy’s going to be on fire. Giving Daddy socks for Father’s Day is usually a sign that you have no imagination, or money, or both. But with just a lot of money and my imagination you too can have the ultimate gift this season. Try my simple new Trophy H sock redesign idea at home. It even works on those grey work socks from Canadian Tire like you gave him last year for F Day and for Christmas and his birthday. You, my silent reader, have only one choice for socks this holiday. “Neil’s Treholefree H” socks. Go for it. Show the big boss just how much you care.
If it is going to be just socks again this year for Pappy, please jazz up the offer a little, with a surprise hidden in the toe. It depends on your budget, but you can hide a treat like a chocolate, or an orange, or the keys to a new Porsche to perk up any man’s day.
How about purchasing the big guy season tickets to the opera or hockey if he’s one of those? This year, how about giving your own special Daddy a new thong or even one of your old ones if you don’t have the big bucks? Of course, then you might have to throw in a gift certificate at a waxing salon for a Brazilian and/or anal bleach, but, “Hey its Daddy”. A new thong for the summer BBQ season might not suit every father, but the daddies it would suit, would be worth the shop.
If you are going for salon gift certificates then a coupon for a facial is something I am sure any Dad can use. I mean which would your Pop rather have, a scalp treatment and pedicure or one more boring gift certificate from Home Hardware?
Or go out of your way to make reservations at an expensive dining establishment like Tim Horton’s or even the Old Spaghetti Factory instead of the lunch counter at Costco. It’s really up to you how you chose to celebrate and pamper the man who gave you everything.
I trust these simple Trophy H hints will help make your shopping easier this week. My final word on Father’s Day gifts is this, my silent reader. Don’t go out and buy Daddy a cute pet like a puppy. Save that for Thanksgiving.
For about 10 years now I have invited my Father out for lunch on Father’s Day to talk about the old days to share memories of growing up together; the good, bad and the ugly like all “boys and their dads” relationships. The jealous tug to win “Mother’s” attention might have gotten in our way. Who had the bigger womb experience on that ride? 15 minutes for him according to Maw. Nine months and 4 days of labour for Sonny boy.
Dad always prayed I’d someday stop pirouetting and join the hockey team. That never happened. I never learned how to fix the tractor. I wouldn’t know where to look to even find the oil let alone change it. I could never operate the chain saw although I grew adapt at arranging the course saw dust into Zen gardens. We agreed to disagree on almost everything. We were far too much alike. A portrait of my father sits in my office in Asia along with candid shots of some of my other relatives. Everyone who sees the hand tinted exposure thinks it’s me. It’s hot. Boys and their Dad’s. We are just special. In the past 10 years on Father’s Day the only thing missing has been my Father. Dad died all those years ago. 10 or so years of Father’s Day socks he has missed. Ten or so years of early morning phone calls asking about the weather or who has died and how the crops are doing. It’s a bit easier each new Father’s Day. It’s just not been any simpler.

Today's Trophy H Pasta.

2010-06-11T14:51:00.000-07:00

I feel its best not to get carried away with too many flavours when creating a decent, quick pasta sauce, unless, of course, it’s a Mexican mole sauce which requires about 45 ingredients.
Today’s pasta I used penne. My sauce I made from bacon, smoked salmon, black olives and a pesto cream. I wanted a creamy sauce to smother inside and around those perfect tubes of joy.
The plate of pasta heaven I garnished with some baby fresh oregano leaves and crumbled goat cheese, not the usual Parmesan.
I say, my silent reader, keep it simple and watch them lick their plates.
If you are lucky enough to live near some organic markets you might try this elk pasta treat. I found fresh elk sausage with huckleberries and also some elk pepperoni. I used these two main ingredients as the star for this orcheitto pasta paired with still more of my craving for wild morel mushrooms. I added some green peas and sweet red peppers for some colour and added texture. A good swirl of olive oil and some freshly grated Parmasean finshes off the dish.

Some Trophy H thoughts for today from my desk to yours, my silent reader.

2010-06-07T12:55:00.000-07:00

We are all affected by the recent recession and we must be prepared for a few cutbacks.
Even MrD and me,myself and I, the Trophy H, are not above making some major changes in our everyday lifestyle, if it’s for the good of society.
I have already cutback on maids.
I no longer have a maid cleaning our condo 5 mornings a week.
Now she comes only once a week.
She still must do the same work.
I don’t put my Thursday, Porches Carrera 4 through the car wash. That is another thing the maid gets to do.
Cutbacks?
Last Sunday I took clients out for dinner at the biggest hotel here in Vancouver. None of us ordered the appetizers to go with our martinis.
We even ordered bottles of the house wine to go with the plats du jour.
I noticed the over worked and under paid staff at the hotel had also suffered a few cutbacks.
So my service was cutback, a bit.
So their tip was cutback, a lot.
I recently shopped at the local organic farmer’s market and bought regular olive oil and not the extra virgin pressed between the thighs of young Greek gods.
I cut back on a full wheel of French Brie cheese.
A half a wheel does not taste the same as a full wheel.
But I can learn to live with cutbacks.
MrD and I flew business class and not first class home from Asia the second last trip.
I have reduced my botox injections by 10 %.
I have not had my natural blond hair roots touched up in a noticeable amount of time.
I do not shop for shoes before 2 pm. on Mondays.
MrD only allows me to shop at Holt's on days that end in “Y”
See we can all make a difference.
Keep a stiff upper lip and don’t be hesitant to make sacrifices my silent reader.

Two easy slow cooker recipes.

2010-05-30T15:44:00.001-07:00

Here are three easy but not quick trophy H recipes to add some zip to your cooking life. They also make great gifts to give to other food fans. Slow cookers or crock pots as they used to be called are not just for pot roast anymore. Here are two simple ideas even a new cook can master.
Mushroom pate. Puree a kilo of fresh mushrooms in a food processor or a blender with a bit of red wine or vegetable stock. If you don’t have a machine, get someone who loves you or works for you to chop the mushrooms as finely as possible. I used morel mushrooms for this the last time because they were in season but you can use any kind of mushrooms. This is actually a time where even those tasteless white button mushrooms can be utilized or try a combo of mushrooms. Put the mushroom blend in a slow cooker and add some salt and a good amount of black pepper. I sometimes add a teaspoon of fresh chopped rosemary but you can leave out the herbs and just go with the mushrooms and salt and pepper.
Turn the cooker on low and leave the lid off to allow the liquid to evaporate. Scrape down the sides with a spatula every half hour or so and give the mix a stir. When most of the liquid is gone, after about 4 hours, you are left with a mushroom concentrate perfect for adding to sauces, marinades or just eating as a spread on your favorite toast.
I used this pate to stuff chicken breast two ways. I put a layer under the skin and I made a pocket incision in the side and filled that with a mixture of the mushrooms, chopped black olives and capers. I served this with a side of fried polenta with herbs to MrD.
The extra pate freezes well or you can store it in the fridge for about a week before a blue mold starts and you have a whole new fungus food group but you are likely to eat it all before either of those things are required.
My second trophy H recipe is even easier and just as useful. Blend together equal amounts of maple syrup and regular, not your 25 year old 150 dollar balsamic vinegar, in a slow cooker and let cook on the low temperature with the lid off. I usually make this at night time and just leave it simmer away until the morning. You don’t even have to stir this. You are left with a truly trophy glaze that works on everything from chicken to ice cream and lasts for months in your refrigerator. Store the maple balsamic glaze in one of those squeeze bottles so handy for plate decorating.

Morel Mushroom BBQ Sauce

1/3 cup smooth Dijon mustard
1/3 cup tomato paste
½ cup banana or regular ketchup
1/3 cup maple syrup
1/3 cup equal parts Balsamic and malt vinegars
¼ teaspoon ancho chili powder
½ cup precooked morel mushroom paste
½ cup precooked chopped morels

Stir all ingredients together and cook uncovered in your slow cooker on the low temperature setting for about 2 hours. Excellent for grilled leather, feather, fin or even veggies.

MrD and trophy H fly upfront.

2010-05-07T00:17:00.000-07:00

Every so often when MrD and I have to do the shuttle run back and forth to Manila from Vancouver we use our mileage points to upgrade from our business class seats to first class. We have both put more than enough time sitting in monkey class and there is nothing wrong with that but when you are old and cranky its best to have a bit of leg room and a flat bed or just stay home.
Friends and family have asked me many times what it is like up there past the curtains. Most people really don’t like to hear about others having a good time as much as the bad side of things. Fair enough. Those people can now click the close button and get on with the real world. For the rest who want to hear about my trip in 2D then read on my silent readers. Here is an excerpt from my diary.
I settle into seat 2D for the 13 hour and 22 minute flight to Hong Kong from Vancouver. It’s already nearly 3 am. There are only six seats in first class and 2 attendants, Valerie and Clarisse to take care of us. Valerie, one of our two flight attendants brings my complimentary Shanghai Tang pajamas and a Bally amenity kit. I take time to peak inside the Bally double zippered black bag and find a tooth brush, Colgate mouth wash and tooth paste, all standard, a shoe horn, Acca Kappa amenities consisting of a lip balm, anti aging moisturizer, white moss facial mist, ear plugs and a wooden comb. All in all no surprises there. Tonight’s soft cotton PJ’s have a rusty brown trim. I quickly change into an older pair of PJ’s I brought with me, saving the new ones for future house guests to snuggle up in some day. I am wearing a blue trimmed pair from an earlier flight so I don’t look part of the “tour” plus the crew will know I’ve been here before.
MrD is seated just in front and is already flipping through the foreign language movie channels. A New York Hasidim Jewish couple have seats to our right. He is standing up in his prayer shawl rocking back and forth in mid prayers. The high walls or our first class suites hide whoever the two to our left are. I notice there are no fresh orchids in our wall mounted flower vases. Cut backs on Cathay?
I have given our head flight attendant a large bar of Lindt 85% dark chocolate. It’s a good travel tip to bring small gifts for the cabin staff no matter where they seat you on the plane.
It’s 2:35 am. The big bird leaves the docking area. Our welcome bubbles have been sipped and flutes collected. Up, up and away. Our monkeys are travelling with us tonight. I hope they don’t snore. I hope I do. I managed to get a couple of hours sleep before we left so I can stay awake and enjoy some of the luxurious service. In first you order your food ala carte from the menu and eat when you want. I want to watch a movie or two.
Clarisse just brought the dinner menu and said she’d checked on the where abouts of the missing orchids. Tonight’s food fare starts with caviar and smoked salmon, asparagus soup to follow before a salad of greens with grilled prawns, dried cranberries, pecans dressed in a dilled lemon dressing. To follow will be pan fried beef tenderloin and portabello mushrooms with Cabernet sauce, served along seasonal roasted veggies and red skin potato mash. There is also ricotta ravioli with tomato basil sauce if I want but pasta on planes never works out to be a good choice. It is always comes partially dried out. I take that back. The 2 dollar instant noodles you have to buy on Air Canada is a delightful meal choice considering their options.
There is also a Chinese menu. We are after all on the way to Hong Kong. Cathay offers a chicken and young coconut soup, followed by a cold plate of marinated bean curd and carrots with the main of stir fried sea food with X.O. sauce, steamed rice and stir fried veggies. Its first so we can pick and choose or go for the works.
But first before I order any food,Clarisse returns and drops off a dish of warm smoked almonds and offers me a flute of the Krug Grand Cuvee Champagne. The wine list reads like the who’s who of what wine connoisseurs drool over. Like the Vintage Chardonnay and nose in the glass Malbecs. Chateau stars from 2003. No 4 star entries here. They are back in business class. This flight features the 2009 Morgon. A French Bordeaux Burgundy, old old vines of Gamay. 2009 was an exceptional vintage with a dense crimson dark cherry hint laced with velvet tannins. It promises a persistent length still fragrant at 15 thousand feet in a pressurized tin can.
There are lots of good cheeses on the menu for desert like Cambozola, Cheddar, Oka or goat cheese to go with the fresh berries and custard or the triple chocolate cake with vanilla cream and raspberry coulis. (But haven’t we just about had about enough raspberry coulis?) There is also a choice of black sesame desert for our Chinese fans and a full supply of chocolate pralines in case we are still feeling peckish.
If I find myself getting hungry later on there are snacks of grilled pork quesadillas, chicken, cheddar, tomato and bacon baguettes or braised beef brisket with noodles in soup. There is also a hot pot of rice with a minced pork patty and mushrooms in chicken broth or several flavours of Haagan Dass ice cream.
All this should keep me going until breakfast arrives two hours before landing in Hong Kong. My menu promises fresh squeezed juices or papaya kiwi smoothies, fresh fruits and yoghurt with or without cereal. Eggs served which ever way I fancy, like, boiled, fried sunny side up or scrambled and served with grilled Canadian ham, Cajun sausage, potato rosti, grilled Roma tomatoes and asparagus. There is a basket of warm croissant, muffins and toast to go with all that.
There is also a breakfast tray of dim sum for our Chinese lover’s morning menu and of course Kosher meals for my neighbours.
All this with a cappuccino, latte or espresso?
I fasten my seat belt for the long flight ahead and prepare to stuff my face.
Tonight we have four choices in our own bread baskets. Cathay’s signature garlic bread is not toasted as well as I like it. Besides, who eats garlic bread with caviar? The Melba toast will do just fine. Clarisse offers second helpings of caviar and salmon but I decline and move on to the soup course. A warm crusty rosemary bun keeps me amused while I wait and shuffle the over abundance of silver and crystal around on my linen covered over sized table.
The asparagus soup arrives with floating bits of al dente spring spears. I order a glass of French 2006 Meursault Les Clous from Bouchard Pere & Fils. It is crisp and clean as the asparagus floating in the pottage.
The soup is a little thin but the asparagus shines through. The wine proves a perfect compliment and reminds me of spring mountain meadows on a cool morning. All this at 15,000 feet and 4am remember. I’m glad I had a long nap before all this indulgence. I have to pace myself so I leave some soup for Clarisse to clear. Moments later Valerie arrives with tonight’s salad of huge jumbo prawns and roasted pecans. The prawns are a little too dry but the greens are crisp and abundant. The dried cranberries are complimented by the subtle lemon dill dressing.
I keep going back for crumbs and nibbles of the soft rosemary bun. I am not a big bread eater but this has a punch I enjoy. Valerie clears my left over shrimp salad. I am still attempting to pace myself. The beef and a glass of 2009 Morgon will follow. It shows up looking just like the steaks served in business class but on a bigger plate and swimming in more gravy but in first class we don’t call it gravy. The Morgon I send back because it’s too floral and almost sweet. Clarrisse offers a snifter of the 2003 Lynch Bages. It matches well with the beef, green and yellow grilled zucchini, carrot cornels and my lovely smashed red potatoes.
I have been eating for two hours and I still have dessert and coffee to work my way through. I leave a lot of the steak and veggies. I choose 2 of the 4 cheese selections although they all look tempting. Clarisse offers the vintage Ramos Pinto 10 year old Port to go with the cheese but I decline and sip a tiny bit more of the Bages. I decide to pass on the three other desert choices or I will have to go jogging into the back monkey section or do a trophy H Roman diet number in the toilet.
Besides it is time to sleep so while I go freshen up and give my good nights to MrD who is still munching away and watching films in foreign languages, Clarrisse and Valerie make up my 81 inch flat bed with its own mattress, over stuffed pillows and thick white duvet. Our fellow travelers are already off to dreamland.
I won’t bore you with breakfast details other than to let you know that the smoothie was a good choice and the fried egg sunny side up was not.
And then poof, all too soon the 14 hours had passed and the captain had turned on the seat belt signs for landing.
I don’t know how I managed to waddle off the plane and through immigration but MrD and I were soon settled into our suite at the Marriott in Hong Kong Central just in time for another breakfast in the business lounge.

In search of the once a month perfect burger.

2010-04-18T15:41:00.000-07:00

It’s one burger a month for the Trophy Husband. This better be good I silently implore Mandy the bartender at “The Two Parrots” on the corner of Granville and Davie Streets in downtown Vancouver. My “Beef Canuck Burger” arrives nearly hidden under a side of fries that look not too greasy and show good colour. I hate pale fries. The charred champion’s nestled on a multi-grain bun. I don’t enjoy chewing on white buns. His big thick meaty patty hides beneath a glistening blanket of melted Canadian cheddar. Two strips of crispy bacon snuggle topside on my precious. I see some dill pickle and a generous - maybe too generous - slice of uncooked red onion, two pieces of real tomato and a leaf of fresh curly lettuce.
This Canuck is too big for my Trophy H mouth. I rip into his side as he drips his warm juice down the back of my hand. My second attack goes for his top. I bite down hard enough to rip a hunk of this warm flesh and chew. My teeth discover grilled mushrooms with their perfect, nipple-like texture. A dollop of flavoured mayo squirts around my tongue. I douse the fries with black pepper, cider vinegar and lovely tears of yellow hot dog mustard. No salt. Never ketchup! I can easily leave a lot of the fries, but all this tasty Canuck is going home in my gut.
This is my once a month burger fling. The bun could have been a bit more toasted.
A five star burger? Not quite, but better than most bar burgers. The fries get three stars only. But fries don’t really count to a trophy H. It’s the meat. Good meat between excellent bits of buns. The rest is not important in my once a monthly.
“The four star burger and a glass of house red, taxes and Mandy’s tip comes in at $20.
Let me know where to try next month’s burger. I think I will be in Hong Kong or Manila.
Stay tuned for next week’s update, my silent reader.

Easy pleasing spring pasta.

2010-04-12T12:30:00.000-07:00

Sorry my faithful silent reader to have left you hanging in cyber blog land for such a very long time. A lot of what has been happening in my life lately is best left unrecorded. I am back and will be sticking to writing about food this week.
There is a new restaurant called “Basil Pasta Bar” that opened here in Vancouver on Davie Street, just around the corner from where our home is located. They have a great selection of ingredients, several choices of pasta and excellent sauces. You just put together which ever combo suits your fancy. It makes for an excellent test kitchen for my trophy H pasta suppers loved by MrD and crowds of lucky dining guests.
Here is a great recipe for an easy pleasing pasta dish that you can make in your own kitchen.
I used fussily but any pasta you want will work just “bene”. Chop up a couple of anchovies, a strip of crunchy grilled bacon, a slice or two of smoked salmon and a couple of spears of grilled asparagus and add these all to the pasta with a spoon of pesto. Stir well and serve garnished with some crumpled goat cheese and fresh oregano.
Buon Appetito

2010-02-25T22:18:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite trophy H holiday pastimes is to wander along a beach letting my mind drift off to sea while the sounds of the waves relaxes and soothes my city mind. Boracay is my place for getting away. I was spending a wonderful afternoon strolling along the coast minding my own business when I felt something like a light kiss on my ankle. It turned out to be a slight nudge from a black banded water snake. What this young devil was doing on the beach I didn’t know but I was glad it was too small to get its fangs into me. “Very poisonous,” grinned two sailors who sat watching. Fortunately I did not scream and or faint but just stepped away and admired the serpent in its camouflaged splendor.
The snake was only about a foot in length. It was clearly a baby. Its parents were likely a meter long. This sea krait has a flattened tail like a fin that enables them to swim. They are most comfortable underwater where they can stay submerged for 15 minutes but this hansom specimen was exploring the sandy shore of rocks and sea weed washed ashore on this lonely section of beach on the island of Boracay in the Philippines. I had seen a large cousin of this creature the first and only time I went snorkeling around the island some years ago. I am a fan of snakes but prefer them to be behind glass in a sealed terrarium or made into a nice belt.
I watched this young fellow slither over the volcanic rocks at the water’s edge. I managed to get out my video camera and take a short film to show my snow shoveling friends back in Canada. The two sailors kept up telling snake stories. In the olden days I might have grabbed a long stick and smashed the serpent into paste but I happily let this beauty continue on its slinky way. I did not mention the scene to MrD and MsH, my travel companions who would likely have insisted we leave the island immediately for the city.
When I returned to Manila I showed the video to my staff who oohed and awed at my luck to see the most poisonous snake in the Philippines. They explained it is worse than a cobra bite because there is no anti venom. You have 8 hours to live before the paralysis in the toxic venom stills your heart. Not a fun way for a trophy H to spend a holiday.

Time flies when I am too.

2010-02-19T22:02:00.000-08:00

It is great to be back home in Manila. The last week or so has found me sitting at airports awaiting long, long overdue flights or finally on board, stretched out, with my feet up and a glass of champs, earphones on and flipping channels trying to forget just how long the flights from Vancouver to Sydney, Australia really are in actual hours. The added comfort of having my sister along for the ride made it all bearable but it has not been easy.
First Cathay Pacific’s flight from Vancouver to Hong Kong which originates in NYC was delayed from 2 am until 5am because of snow storms on the east coast. That meant that after the 12 hour flight across the Pacific we would miss our connecting flight to Manila. They transferred us to an afternoon flight 6 hours after our scheduled takeoff time. Fortunately the Cathay lounge has shower facilities so we could freshen up a bit. If you have to get stuck in an airport lounge then Cathay Pacific’s Hong Kong Wing Lounge is as good a place as any.
MsH and I finally made it home to my home in Manila to rest for the night but it was back to the airport the next day for another flight back to Hong Kong with connections to Sydney, Australia. This time the flights were on time but when we arrived in Sydney at our hotel about 9:30 am the following morning. Our hotel room was not ready until 1:30 and I had my first appointment at 2pm. Trophy H was not in a very energetic mood and had to dig deep for any signs of my good humour.
The rest of the time spent in Sydney was as wonderful as always. I introduced Sis to old friends and we both made a couple of new ones. In between alternating rain showers and heat waves we patted the kangaroos and got our photo with Maggie the Koala at Sydney’s Taronga Zoo. MsH and I supped, sipped and shopped some of Sydney’s sensational offerings. Busy friends invited us to fabulous picnics, delicious dinners at their houses and guided tours of the sites of Sydney most tourists would not get to experience.
All too soon our short visit down under finished and we flew back to Manila to meet up with MrD who arrived from Vancouver after a stay in Tokyo. Now we can relax at home and put our tired feet up in the heavy heat. Tuesday we three will be flying off again to my favourite Island of Boracay that readers remember from my previous blogs.

A trophy H's guide to Aussie slang for MsH.

2010-02-01T09:42:00.000-08:00

I can speak a little trophy H Australian slang thanks to spending several debauched afternoons down under with one or three of our lovable Aussie neighbours. In less than two weeks time, the day before the Vancouver Winter Olympics begin, I will make tracks down under to Sydney Australia with my older sister MsH. (I am hoping she will meet an Aussie sheep farming surfer type bloke, fall in love, get married and move to the other side of the planet away from what's left of her dysfunctional family.) Sis is a saint, lives in the frozen Canadian mid north taking care of very old people inside an old folk’s factory. Sis wants to pet a roo before she karks it. We are flying on Cathay Pacific, not Qantas, because business class is really so much better on CX. I will have about 24 air hours, to teach MsH Australian. My teacher was a lairy wharfie with an Irish accent. I met him in a seedy bar on Oxford Street in Sydney, Australia. He was all smiles and reddish blond hair. He began to fire away that he hadn’t got a zack, but was easy. I offered him my xxxx in exchange for a language lesson. He sat down all of his 6’8” workman’s blond self beside me for a yabbber, told me I looked a tall poppy, a dag and a galah to boot all lairs and not some naff, lamb brained, Joe Bloggs sitting at Maccas, giving mates an earbashing, over some barney with the boss. “Onya!”, he grinned and leaning down low towards me, begged me for a pash.
I thanked him for his kind observances and reluctantly declined his offer, but I surely didn’t rack off about it.
MsH is packing and preparing for our CX veg out and ear bashings. I never fill up my suitcase early. You, silent reader, know that the trophy H packs well. Tune in next week for more travel ideas about packing and fashionable updates. I’ll have three
trophy H helpful hints on how not to appear to be nouveau trash when you fly business or first class. I will also explain when and where and with whom to perform properly, the upgrade eyelashes flutter... Have a good week.

. Aussie Slang Phrases from “A” to “Z”

A over T verb:- to fall over, from "arse over tits".Barney noun:- an argument or fight cark it verb:- to die. dag adjective:- bits of manure that stick to the long wool around a sheep's bottom forming small dangling balls. Also a term for a funny person, nerd, goof, loser. In this respect it can have either an endearing or disparaging meaning, although is usually used for a likable fellow. Earbashing noun:- to talk to, or be talked to, for a long time. Generally implies a reprimand. fire away verb:- used to tell someone to begin speaking, usually to begin speaking their mind. Galah adjective:- an endearing term for a fool or silly person. Also, and from, a particularly noisy parrot coloured Pink and Grey. have a burl, have a crack, have a go verb:- to attempt to do something considered a little difficult. I'm easy adjective:- not worried, not concerned, or has no preference to the outcome of a choice. Joe Bloggs noun:- the average person in the street. Although the term is male, it is non-specific and therefor signifies a person of either sex. kark it verb:- to die or cease operation. Lair noun:- a flashily dressed young man, or a lout. Lairy adjective:- flashy, particularly appearance. lamb-brained adjective:- some one who is stupid or impractical. Macca's noun:- McDonald's make tracks verb:- to leave, depart or head off. Naff adjective:- useless, low quality, ridiculous. Onya misc:- an expression of encouragement, short for good on you. Pash noun:- a long and enthusiastic kiss. QANTAS noun:- Australia's national air carrier. QANTAS is an acronym for Queensland and Northern Territory Aerial Services Ltd. rack off misc:- go away, used when very angry with someone tall poppy noun:- a successful person or achiever who, as a result, is the target of jealousy and grudging remarks. up a gum tree noun:- confused, in a quandary about a problem. veg out verb:- to relax and think of, er, nothing. Waffle noun:- nonsense wharfie noun:- a dockside worker. XXXX noun:- Four X, the brand name for a popular Queensland beer. yabber verb:- to talk too much zack noun:- a Sixpence. Pre decimal currency used before Feb 1966. The term is still used today, but to indicate that someone is broke. "I haven't got a zack".

A visit with MsC

2010-01-24T07:52:00.000-08:00

The trophy H has returned to MrD from a one day trip to Toronto visiting the fabulous MsC whom I have known for more than 30 years. We have been friends; competitors; hormone focused teenage mutant high school classmates. In our twenties, we shared a basement apartment in Rosedale for a couple of years. We were estranged friends at the worst of times but up close and personal about it all. We share a story. It's all fodder for the fire.
This recent chapter MsC and I are writing seems to involve, no one’s favourite topics, cancer and dying. MsC is writing from her hospital room where family and friends juggle visiting hours or some kind hospital staff fetches her for another rousing round of radiation. (If you have not yet found your way to her honestly heroic blog, “The Clothes Line Saga”, then you must read it.
I only managed two opportunities to visit with MsC this trip. I did not want to over stay my welcome or wear it out. I spent the morning perched at or on the side of her tiny bed talking far too much about needless trifles while MsC could only whisper. Her illness has affected her vocal cords. She promised me it was not painful for her to talk but she can only whisper. Staff interrupted with important questions about bowel movements, oatmeal or cream of wheat and offers of more pain altering medications. I did massage her bum leg for a bit but in case MsC’s mom reads this I did not rub above the knee. I got to fetch MsC ice chips from the “Nourishment Room”, down the hall on the other side of the nurse’s station. She finds it hard to swallow water but the ice chips can easily melt on her tongue and also give her something to occupy her wretched time. The errand gave me a moment to feel that I was actually doing anything useful in this nightmarish setting.
I had brought, what I thought, were totally useless gifts like a hand painted Japanese cocktail dress and a tiara. The diva dress was put on hold to go with martinis some other time. MsC had recently lost the use of her left dancing leg when the cancer had taken a tacky taste of her spine. However the tiara was found useful and went into immediate use and fit MsC perfectly.
I had fashioned a fragile crown from a bent silver wire, an off centered beaten looking heart between two lumpy loops, where huge diamonds or emeralds, should, but did not glimmer. All too soon my exhausted friend had me hang up her tiara in the sunny window and shooed me out the door so she could actually get some real work done.
I returned in the afternoon with a small bag of fruit in my hand. I entered the room and found my friend asleep, her thin pale white face on her pillow, slightly uplifted in her dreams, like I had remembered it thirty odd years ago. I was ten years old,hiding outside in my fourth grade school yard, in the bushes; either from the bullies, or doing them. I recalled watching MsC’s mother help her across the street from their house to our school. Msc was born with scoliosis.
MsC was nine. I was ten. We have been more or less friends ever since and always will be until death do us part and one day more.
I did not awaken MsC. She seldom gets any rest with the pain and discomfort her body is going through. I stood quietly in the corner of the hospital room. I let a few fond memories run by while I watched my poor tired and wasted ill friend sleep in comfort. MsC, as usual, looked rather grand, noble and at peace, all things considering,
It was hard to leave my sleeping pal without saying goodbye in words. I left the fruit on the bedside chair with a hurried note. I blew one more air kiss to MsC. Her new tiara hung on a framed photo of her with her real family.
Outside, the cold afternoon Toronto sun shone upon us all. I drifted back to my hotel, did a trophy H pack up, checked out, grabbed a limo, did the airport thing and flew home to MrD without my usual shopping or stopping.

Thirteen true truffle tales.

2010-01-17T15:08:00.000-08:00

Last week’s MATH’s, (middle aged trophy husband’s), report on easy quick food recipes, brought requests for ideas with more exotic ingredients. Here are some truffle dishes I have prepared for MrD.
But, first, let me present the good and bad news about our humble smelly friend the truffle. One small jar of truffle paste can cost anywhere from 10 to 100 dollars. That is the bad news. The good news is a little truffle goes a very long way.
Here is a quick list of a few of my simple food favourites made fresh again with my funky fungal friend.

MATH’s thirteen terrific truffle temptations.

Truffle cream cheese spread
Truffle pot stickers
Truffle, tomato and wild rice bruschetta
Grilled cheese sandwiches with truffles
Smoked wild salmon omelettes with truffles
Truffle pizza
Pasta with truffles
Tuna steak with a truffle crust
Roast chicken with truffles under the skin
Pork chops stuffed with sauerkraut, goat cheese and truffles
Ham with truffles, pineapple and Swiss cheese
Baked sweet potato fries with dill and truffle paste

Truffle ice cream? Okay maybe not.

Don’t let our friend the snobby truffle’s reputation ruin your dinner. A truffle is just a mushroom that never grew up.
Contact me if you want any of the recipes.
I am off to Toronto later this week without MrD for a quick visit with the fabulous MsC and will report back next week end. Have a great week.

Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner ideas.

2010-01-09T10:15:00.000-08:00

I started “middleagedtrophyhusband” two months ago aimed at some tips for food highlighted with my photography. Since then, you, faithful silent reader have gotten to know much about my fashionable traveled married life with the small but powerful Asian mogul MrD but, you haven’t had as many food ideas. So, this week while I clean out the refrigerator from yesterday, you will get three easy MATH’s (middle aged trophy husband’s) 15 minute recipes for breakfast, lunch and dinner (pictured above) to keep you satiated, soothingly satisfied and still ready for the runway.
Breakfast? After his morning gymnastics MrD prefers either a bowl of granola or a sandwichio. (Remember MrD speaks to me in foreign languages.) Today, was sandwichio's turn.
To make your own MATH’s grilled cheese you will need 1 slice of good chewy bread, 2 slices of strong cheddar cheese and 2 slices of my fabulous MATH’s last night's chicken roulade. (Okay use whatever protein you have.) Zap this puppy in a microwave for a minute or for the more “Julia inclined” bake in a preheated 350 F/225 C oven for about 7 minutes until the cheese starts to melt but not flow like a weepy drag queen’s mascara. Chop a green onion on diagonal slices, thinly as your knife skills allow. Crisp slivers of green onions set off our visual taste buds before the bumpy ones on our tongue take their turn to taste.
Cast a few over the warm sandwich nestled next to a handful of micro greens and a few tomato tots. Lunch? For this simple, delicious and elegant open face sandwich, use a baked thin pizza crust from your local grocery. I sourced flat Persian bread in one of the Middle Eastern markets. Spread a slice with hummus, sun dried tomato pesto and some fresh or dried oregano. Pop this in your microwave for one minute (being sure to remove any cats or poodles first). Then simply arrange generous slices of smoked salmon around the edges or the warm bread. Fill the center with as much salmon caviar as you like or your budget allows.
Dinner? One cup of pork sausage is used here as a flavour ingredient for the dish rather than the main event. Chop all your choices of vegetables into bite sized, ready when you are pieces, before you start to fry anything. Brown in a wok or frying pan one cup of pork sausage in some olive oil and a little duck or bacon fat. Stir in vegetables starting with the ones that take the longest. When you have fried all the veggies, leaving them still crunchy, mix in 2 cups of leftover pasta, heat, eat and enjoy.
The trophy part, my silent reader, other than remaining calm, looking gorgeous and unfazed during all this, is to plan the menu, shop, prepare the food, serve MrD his portion, photograph your share, eat the tasty offering, download the photos, Photoshop them, write about it all, edit the writing with MrD, post it and still have a life for more important things like shopping for groceries and more shoes but that’s a whole other MATH story.
One last thing for you my silent reader. There is a comment box if you scroll down. Please feel free to make comments, suggest topics or ask MATH questions.

Happy. Happy. Happy 14th.

2010-01-02T13:27:00.001-08:00

Fourteen years ago on New Years Evening I stepped off a flight from ten years theater work in Denmark and into the role of Trophy H for MrD. This was Bangkok. 1996. New Years Eve was my choice. I am so bad with remembering anniversaries. There is usually a party in which ever city we find ourselves. Bubbles to make toasts at each other. Forty years old was time for me to settle down. I usually lie about my age. Its cheaper than a face lift and takes less time. I am a truly greatly inspired liar but have an equally true lousy memory. I always add on exactly ten years when asked my age. People usually then compliment you on how well you look. This trick doesn't always work. These can be fun times too. Over the years MrD and I have celebrated our anniversary nights in Thailand. India. Singapore. Brunei. Taiwan. The Philippines. Canada. I don't remember the other destinations. MrD no doubt has an alphabetised list. We seldom stay up for the twelve o'clock countdown. We go to bed early. We sleep early too. The last time we stayed up to twelve midnight was the 1999-2000 year change. MrD is up early to run the empire. I am up even earlier to become the trophy H. Our lovely newly paid for palace in the Vancouver sky this year was the venue. Lots to make toasts about this past year and to the new year. MrD's immigrant visa is in final days this year. He can apply as a Canadian citizen in 269 days of staying in the country. (MrD has a special calender with the days numbered off when he is in and out of the country.) I am not going to reminisce about the past. You know who you are and you know how we each suffered all the bumps and grinds up the path of light. Thank you Shirley Maclean. I forgive us all for everything. All the nooks and crannies. All the lightness and darkness of being in a relationship. It is work. But like a farmer ploughing a field or an artist capturing tomorrow's sunset. It is good work. MrD takes care of me and the empire. I take care of MrD and the details. The luscious details. How did the trophy H celebrate fourteen years with MrD? Matching silver eagle rings by the ever so talented Don Lancaster. Mine baked inside Mrd's favourite creme caramel desert. MrD's ring, which fits perfectly, of course,... in a small red velvet snapped lidded box. I also surprised him with the news that we were having at least three guests and maybe five for luncheon tomorrow when the trophy H had challenged the Porsche guy to a meat loaf cook off. But that's another story. Happy. Happy. Happy. Here's to celebrating the 15Th. That is my only New Year's resolution.

Socks for Xmas?

2009-12-28T18:27:00.000-08:00

MrD and I do not exchange gifts on December 25. That comes to many of my readers as a surprise. My theory is why have only this one occasion to bring me gifts? Every day is a trophy H day. Bah Humbug to the rest. I like the holiday food. I love the traditional Canadian Christmas dinner with the turkey and the cranberries and the whole stuffing, mashed potato, pickles and pie until you burst and then start crying. Please call the fat helpers hot line listed below.
This year as many of you know an invitation from a neighbour for MrD and myself to join them for lunch turned into the trophy H enlisting the help of MrD and cooking lunch for seven...I had planned a nice quiet nosh on a rack of reindeer I had brining in a brown sugar and salted lavender bath. MrD in a rare spirit of the holidays readily agreed to make his family's famous beef roll called "Marcon", the star of every Filipino holiday table. He pretends not to cook and does so sparingly. He is a great cook. I pretend to cook. I am not bad. I do it constantly.
The deal was lunch at 13:30. We would provide the appetizer and the main at our place. We would then proceed to wander down the hall to their condo for desert.
They were on time. A very good thing if you ever plan to get invited back. Be on time and don't stay late. Now you know.
We greeted five guests with a cup of warm ginger sweet potato soup.
Our angels from down the hall showed up with tasty German sides of red cabbage and mashed potatoes and the holiday "Keugle" which is sort of stuffing in a dumpling shaped Christmas ball. "Yahvolt das vas gute". (sorry MrD for mein German!) I roasted off a pan of seasonal veggies. It is quite easy to keep the veggies separate with different spices then roast them all off on the same parchment covered baking sheet at 350 for about 30 minutes to 45 depending on your taste for crunch factor. Just chop them all in about the same size.
Our extra angels? The two homeless bachelors who shall remain nameless showed up with chocolates and wine so we let them in but gave them the uncomfortable chairs to sit on. I served the reindeer with a white truffle laced veal demiglace on a "Blue Willow" platter nestled beside MrD's festive meat roll snuggled in his family's secret sauce. Lots of lip smacking and oohing and aweing. The poor hungry lambs heading to the kitchen for seconds or thirds. A cheese ball wound us down. I blended cranberry Cheddar, sage Cheddar, Danish blue with lime juice, chopped dried apricots and figs that had soaked in rum for a year and some no name cream cheese. Dried fruit bread crackers for that and off we went to our neighbour's house for coffee, ice wine and platters of the finest German holiday deserts. Home made by our hostess. Our neighbour's sweet center piece and star of the desert feast was her own German Christmas cheese cake. I am not going to tell you how good this slice of heaven was. I hate the holidays. I ate like a hippo. I look like a hippo. A happy hippo.
Speaking of not getting any gifts.
We weren't but let's.
MrD and I did give our guests each something. I added socks to the gift pile. Socks as a gift? I can hear some lips curl up on one side. "Not a very trophy H gift"! I did first reinvent socks by slicing them into patterns. Socks meant to be worn over another plain pair or just on their own when you decide to let your leg hair down.
All the men reading my blog are encouraged to slice away at their own sock gifts from Mom, sis, Gramma, Aunt Edith, the lady at the office and that weird guy who pretends he knows you. Just follow a simple pattern and don't cut too many holes. These genius socks all came about the day MrD noticed a small hole on the ankle of my sock. MrD mentioned I should fix it. I agreed and went to my office and grabbed a pair of scissors. I cut matching holes on both socks and added a few.
This slice of fashion technique does work for every other piece of clothing. But remember do not try this on your underwear when you are wearing them. Trust me eh?

Happy Anniversary MrD

2009-12-21T08:02:00.000-08:00

08:00. I have been up since 06:25.
S**t, Showered and Shaved. Old Spice High Endurance Long Lasting Stick. Travocort. Bio Oil. Kiel's eye alert. Kiel's Super restorative body lotion (circle pats. Don't rub!)
06:30 Get dressed as today's trophy H. shhssspsssst a waft of duty free Armani something.
06:40 Prepare laundry. Take out the trash. Buy a coffee from J.J. Beans. Dark roast. Cream. No sugar. Return home.
07:00. "Muesli or Sandwich MrD?" "Sandwicho Trophy H." "Ti Minuti?" "Bene".
0710. Plated and presented Trophy H morning sandwicho of Prosciutto, egg and apricot Cheddar on slightly toasted 12 grain. No butter.
07:12 MrD disappears into his corner view office to mangaramo and run the empire.
07:15. Morning coffee break with that still warm J.J. Bean brew and 1/2 cup muesli sprinkled artistically with a handful of fresh cranberries.
07:30 Salvage and rearrange the flowers. Its Monday. Plan the new arrangements later when MrD delivers this week's lot of blooms. Start the laundry.
Dishes done. Trophy Hair on and time to hit the net and type all the morning notes to let everyone know how I manage to keep all this up.
and its 08:16.
08:40. I have finished sewing one line of black and white tiny glass beads on a Speedo Hoody for a fashionistermeester client of mine.
09:30 Time for a morning power walk along the sea wall. Have not seen a seal in a while and the Sea Lions I saw yesterday from the Ferry made me yearn.
13:00. Lunch of home made pizza with elk terrine and sun dried tomato pesto. Served and kitchen cleaned up after. Time for a short siesta and then some photo editing.
13:30 Turned on the fireplace DVD from my sister for the holidays. The fireside DVD comes with Christmas songs but after one round of those I turn them off and just let the fire place images run. No fire trap for MrD and all the pleasure...almost of a real fire. I have some slow braising beef side ribs going on in a slow cooker for tomorrow's dinner. Today they fill the house with smelly warm feelings. Tonight MrD is taking me out to a local culinary hot spot called "Brix". Very west coast BC food 100 mile radius kind of trendy paparazzi eatery with twelve wine glasses for each diner sort of dump. But can they cook? More on that later. I googled their menu and my guess for tonight's choices for MrD and me in reverse order are: Gulf Island Lamb Rack,smoked sea salt & fresh herb crusted lamb rack, jalapeno infused polenta with smoked Quebec cheddar, grilled scallions & bell pepper, whiskey – pale ale demi glace
[ Wine recommendation: Cabernet Sauvignon, Mediterranean red ]Good suggestion.
Fraser Valley Chicken Breast 25?
triple smoked bacon, pecorino cheese, arugula & oven dried tomato stuffed, garlic roasted yellow jacket potato, brocollini and baby carrots, roma tomato chicken reduction
[ Wine recommendation: Pinot Noir, Chardonnay ]
Triple Lemon Cheesecake
chocolate cookie crust, raspberry granite to share?
My afternoon power walk up the hill and back today was a good prep for tonight's dinner. What to do with all this time? Dinner is reserved for 18:00. I need only 15 minutes to dress now that I have the outfit chosen. Time to crack open the reserve hidden way below in the back corner of the wine cellar? No but something adult and respectable is in order for a wedding anniversary. Vina Amalia Reservado Malbek 2005 This Malbek was part of the treasures left behind at last weekend's party to celebrate our last mortgage payment. When in doubt and need a big finish with a flourish go for the Argentines. This wine makes you think Broadway, Evita and Joe Allen's. Top notch. Pop goes the cork. No recession under this cork.
Nice words spoken. Nice words listened to. Wine touches lips and vice versa. Life goes on. Winter is here. December the 21. The first and longest night of winter.
What to wear to dinner was never a question. I am wearing the wool hounds tooth jacket I designed and had tailored in Bangkok for my wedding. A very very long Hollywood style jacket. Black silk satin lapels and pocket flaps to wear inside or out. Good to have a wool suit this time of year. The interchanging pocket flaps keep the suit looking and feeling fresh and new.
I do not have a romantic bone in my body so I choose the same thing over and over on my anniversary minus the disastrous wedding day mohair maxi overcoat which shall not be mentioned. It was the last time MrD asked me if I was going to wear that outfit?
Oh yes I must remember to wear my wedding band. "Ready TH?" "Ready Ready Mrd." Ready world?

Trophy H's triumphant return home from the Empress.

2009-12-20T19:22:00.000-08:00

We pick up on the Trophy H face book chat.

6:39pmDon
but I feel uncomfortable in green

6:40pmNeil
You have an equally exotic profile. If you accented with mad royal purple or aqua marine you could pull it off. Its very period like some of your dungeon and dragon stuff you hide in.

6:40pmDon
from being called the Jolly Green Giant in hi school

Ho ho ho they called after me in the halls

6:41pmNeil
Oh dear. Time to return to a class reunion in this outfit. Don't wait for them to call you. Just show up.

6:41pmDon
haven't been to one yet

maybe there will be a 30th n 2010

6:43pmNeil
I got, "Hey Flees!" rhymed with my last name. Pig Farmer was the number two favourite name I got and then of course I got the "F" word. A lot.

6:44pmDon
scars we bear

6:44pmNeil
make us beautiful and stronger

I got invited back to my 25th. I declined the invitation.

6:46pmNeil
2010 will be the 30th year reunion. I might attend this time. My best pal since the third grade has stage 4 cancer. If she goes I want to be her date.

6:50pmNeil
MrD just attended his 25th Chemical Engineering graduate class in Manila. That is why we were there at that time instead of Christmas. It is also why we have been dieting MrD with trophy H treats for the last three months. It worked he fit into pants, tee shirts and lots of details that he had not worn in a long time. Me too. We ate healthy and did the exercise and pouf. Three months of hard work later we were back on the runway.

6:51pmDon
you were both looking good at the party

6:52pmDon
are you in town for a while now?

6:53pmNeil
Yes! Please. Let me hide the suitcases.

6:53pmDon
you must be a packing pro

6:54pmNeil
I actually have a tip or two for the Trophy Bag. Pack well and less.

6:54pmDon
I'm that way. Can always buy what one has forgotten

6:55pmNeil
Carry on bags only! Check in on the way back if you shopped too much or have to return with armloads of gifts. I don't shop for anyone. My bag is my own.

6:56pmDon
I don't shop hardly anyway

just shoes

6:57pmNeil
MrD carries his things. I carry mine. We take turns with the laptop. Usually. Also no cheating and buying things in foreign cities, giving it to each other and expecting them to carry it home.

6:57pmDon
ha ha

6:57pmNeil
Exactly. How many shoes do you take with you?

6:57pmDon
maybe 2 pairs

6:58pmNeil
I try to limit it to 3 pairs and we are still talking carry on only.

6:58pmDon
depends though when I travel

if I drive someplace then 5 or 6 pairs

6:58pmNeil
Yes I was just talking about what to take to the gym.

6:59pmDon
I often have a change of clothes in my van

7:00pmNeil
I had a wonderful thing happen tonight.

I called my brother to say we had returned safe from Victoria

YOu have a Van?

What colour?

7:01pmDon
I do

taupe

a Safari

7:01pmNeil
yes

??? sorry I am the so not the motor kind of Trophy H

7:02pmDon
tell me about the wonderful thing

7:03pmNeil
I rented a car to visit my family from the airport. My brother asked what kind of car it was. "A red one." Poor guy just cringed. He is like the dad of the gay guy in Glee.

7:03pmDon
I don't have a tv

7:04pmNeil
Ok. He told me that he read my blog from beginning to end in one go yesterday and he liked it.

7:04pmDon
cool

7:04pmNeil
oh yes of course you mentioned you did not have a tv. good for you

7:05pmDon
do you see your family often?

7:05pmNeil
I was on the TV news yesterday and I did not watch it either. Some roving camera on the walking streets near the Empress did an interview about my hat.

7:06pmDon
was it a special hat?

7:06pmNeil
I was just home for Thanks Giving and the fabulous photos in my album are taken at my bros farm where I was also raised.

7:07pmNeil
Oh yes I was wearing one of my own hats. MrD saw the camera crew first and warned me they would pounce. They did. Sort of a jester's hat in black and grey strips with some decorations from last weekend's party and a bell. The GAP and me. I took and exacter knife and cut out the top of the P in GAP so it reads different.

7:08pmDon
has your brother changed much since he took over the farm?

what does Danilo think of your ''notoriety''?

7:10pmNeil
Once a year MrD and I take my Brother and his wife on a vacation so we meet up. I have one sister. This year its once again my turn to take her traveling. MrD doesn't usually join. He will be in Japan. We will go to Sydney Australia. Then we three meet up at our place in Manila. That's the plan for Feb. Leaving the day before the Olympics and returning the day after... And NO we are not renting out our palace in the sky.

7:11pmDon
I wouldn't want strangers in my place either

7:12pmNeil
Mr brother took over the farm from my Father who got it from his father who got it from God. Whatever. He bought from my Dad when I was in grade 9. My sister was already married and moved away to Toronto. My parents and I moved off the farm into the hamlet of 72 people. The rest is history.

7:12pmDon
he s a much older brother?

7:13pmNeil
No live a third of the year inside hotel rooms so I am used to people going through my intimate things. In my own home I like to lock the door and find it the way it looks to be the same when I next return. I would probably have stayed here in Vancouver to be an Olympic spectacle at the Olympics but this is the best time to take my sister out of the frozen north changing diapers for old people off to the coconut palms and a bit of massage.

My brother is the oldest and wisest. Then my sister. I am the baby.

7:14pmDon
how do judge wisdom?

7:15pmNeil
Wisdom is always found in those older than you. Each shows that in some way you have to see.

7:15pmDon
I'll believe you

7:17pmNeil
I can also see wisdom in the youth but I am not traveling that way. I am dying. Youth is living.

7:19pmNeil
To answer you question. MrD deals with my notoriety in his Asian way. He pretends he doesn't know me and walks at some distance. But now after 15 years I understand he walks with pride to be with me as I am proud to always walk with him.

7:19pmDon
I imagined so
thanx for the chat

A trophy H's letter to my Danish source for stinky cheese.

2009-12-15T17:49:00.000-08:00

I just took delivery of 1/2 kilo of prime "Gamle Ole" from Denmark. No this is not wacky tobaccy it is the stinkiest cheese Denmark produces. Bottom line. It smells like the barn. Tastes like Old Ola its name sake. I am sure it was not a political statement about Canada's input to the Global Warming issues in Copenhagen going on now. My cooking and entertaining pals took the trouble to send a vacum packed piece of this Viking wonder and the proper Danish rye bread to cradle the smelly offerings. I facebooked a message. Ulla, with a fabulous career of her own, is also the wife of John the Chef. John just received his own chef jacket with his signature on the jacket. A gift I sent from this trip to Manila. I have had so many truly memorable dinners at their house. They always invited me for Christmas with the family. I can't remember how many times I danced around their jule tree. I miss them. More at Christmas.
They have met MrD and its a mutual admiration society all around. MrD has not had the pleasure of dining at their fabulous Danish home in the Hot new Hellebaek home Bistro John. As a trophy H it is important to rectify this situation. More on that later at another date.

But first the tale of Stinky Old Ole.

1:55pmNeil
Ulla darlink. Gammel Ole er i koleskabe intil jule frokost med vore Tysk neigbors Thomas, Petra og Anna. Tusind tak. Hvad med Johnny? Kigger ham godt ud i den der chef jaket?

1:56pmUlla
He look fantastisk. So sweet of you Niel to send him this fine shirt.

1:58pmUlla
Lugter Gammel Ole lidt i dit køleskab?

2:00pmNeil
nej det va sa lidt. Johnny er sa remligt god to layer mel. Jeg kan godt husk. Lamb i haven ver en og min favorits.

Gamle Ole is still vacum sealed in what you sent him so he is not smelling. He looks like I just picked him out of the koleskabe at Fakta.

2:02pmUlla
Fantastisk. Jeg kan sende dig en ny Gammel Ole når som helst. Bare sig til.

2:02pmNeil
I ate the bread and served some at Saturday's end of the mortgage payment party. It had started to go and would not make the next party. I can actually buy a bread like this here in Vancouver that I will serve on Jule but Gamle Ole is a rare tropical viking treat unavailable here in this land of plenty.

2:04pmNeil
What is your telephone number? I would love to call Jule aften nar i dancer rund den Jule tre

2:12pmUlla
That would be wonderful deer Niel. Our number is 00%%^%$^%^%#$%%%. We are having duck with braun and white potatoes, sauce, redcabbages,prunes,appels and ricepudding. What are you having for chrismas?

2:17pmNeil
skont. I am doing rosemary and lavender crusted reindeer rack with a black truffle veal demi glaze. Roasted seasonal root veggies like parsnips, turnips, sweet potatoes. We also can buy the tiny blue potatoes from South America. I want to make a dish of these but using the braun kartofle recipie. Remind me how to make it? Isn't it just boiled potatoes, skinned and browned in butter and white sugar?

2:19pmNeil
Leftover lavender and rosemary short bread cookies from our party for desert. A romantic ending to a perfect Jule. MrD can figure out the time difference so we don't end up calling you in the morning 6 instead of the evening 6 ikke ogsa?

2:23pmUlla
. Wua. Fantastisk. You must be the best chef. (hvordan gør du det?)

2:31pmNeil
I just love to make food for myself and my husband and my friends and family. In that order... You Ulla darlink my stinky cheese sending venne both family and a friend. My job as the Trophy H is to prepare MrD breakfast, lunch and dinner 6 days a week. In exchange he stays at the computer and runs the empires back in Asia. I never make the same Trophy H meal twice. I have had to invent a lot of fun food. It is very Zen. The more new ways you slice veggies the more you easily slice through life.

2:34pmUlla
Neil you are just the best. MrD is are a very lucky man. Must repeat that-

5:38pmUlla is offline.

A trophy H's letter to those poor people unable to attend.

2009-12-13T13:03:00.000-08:00

All that was missing was for you to have attended. So many people all having a fabulous time is what I remember mostly. MrD and I are tired happy. So very fortunate to have this wonderful home all to our no mortgage payment selves, with such wonderful neighbours. Our living room is a storehouse of treasures left behind. Gifts of pure brilliance, generosity and dare we use the four letter word L**E.
There is so much leftovers to transform into delightful trophy H breakfast, lunches and dinners for MrD. Mrd was flattered with the torrents of praise for my humble mortgage free home made party treats. Jon the twink/bartender/actor/waiter I hired to run the kitchen, ie. keep me out of it did a brilliant job. Juggling the 4 different wild meat terrines, shrimp three ways, the cheese trays and all those funny breads. There was a feeding frenzy. No worries a trophy H always provides too much for parties. I mean what is the alternative? Not enough? MrD would have to commit hari hari cari cari which is mea culpa for trophy H failed.
MrD reckons there were upwards of forty guests who showed up, some with bells on, to celebrate our paying the last payment on our mortgage balance at 1:30 on Friday, December 11. A party was in order. Friends to celebrate. Food. Drink to honour the moment and each other. Many many guests I had never met. Half the numbers this time were our building neighbours. Lots from Mrd's language groups. The odd Italian teacher here. The odder Russian beautiful straight couple. Oh La La. Some returning guests had been to our now famous pizza party. They were the first to the food table. Exciting to greet more new neighbours this time. Great. I want to have them all over. Soon.
Lots of gmen. Old friends who are new and new ones who are old and others who just look that way. The Fabulous M with his exotic Victor from South Africa, via LA, Hong Kong and Burnaby deserves an award as support entertainment host and most important photo taker. I had baked up some very Martha inspired bread sticks all curled around into funny shapes. Like jewelry. Victor saw them as jewels straight away and insisted on a shot of me with one as an ear ring. I didn't take any photos really but managed to click a few point and shoots to get something for the scrap book/face book. A trophy H's work never stops. Mingle talk walk mingle talk walk smile. Download.
I am taking the day off tomorrow.
Wednesday evening is our holiday pot luck party in the main lobby where we I may have mentioned we live mortgage free. Just have a couple of days to plan what to wear. I haven't got a clue what to wear. I don't care. I do know one thing. I am bringing rethought fusion leftovers.

Trophy H's triumphant return home to MrD.

2009-12-08T17:32:00.000-08:00

"If you never go away then how can I miss you?"
I am sure it was someone important I should remember who said that. I do know it was some smart person who said it. That I know. I know I have said it many times.
The last two days the trophy H has spent hours and hours and hours floating in a tin can and poof, hop, fly and he's leaving Manila, transiting in Hong Kong, and home again in Vancouver with MrD.
Flowers on the table? Good. Give MrD his due. There is always a welcome home bouquet of fresh flowers on the table when I return. Its part of his training for taking care of me.
I know its not just the chef MrD misses but he is downstairs still smacking his lips after tonight's dinner I prepared after a full day of marketing and starting to cook for Saturday's party.
My job is to prepare the finger foods. MrD has invited about 90 guests. I am planning on 30 to 40 will show up. Many of them attended our pizza party a few months back. I made 46 different kinds of trophy H pizza in 4 hours. The critics were blown away but I can't rest on those laurels. This menu has to top it. Its just what we trophy H's do.
This time I am not going to slave away in the kitchen. Did that. Done that. Not doing it on Saturday. Everything will be prepared in advance. I have hired a blond Eastern European actor/twink to be a waiter/bartender. He will work. I will mingle with MrD.
This event has nothing to do with this HO HO Christmas thing. Saturday afternoon's fiesta has nothing to do with the Jewish holiday. Thursday MrD and I have a meeting with our banking officer to pay off the last of our mortgage for our sky palace here in Vancouver.
Now, that calls for friends, a bit of bubbles and some finger foods.
I expressed my concern to MrD about a month ago that I was feeling a wee bit stressed about doing the food.
He told me, "You take care of the food and I will take care of the mortgage."
Its the balance of players that really makes the team.
Tonight I am cooling and pressing a meat terrine of duck, chicken and turkey laced with fois gras, black truffles and lavender. MrD enquired if I was making this pate for dinner or for the party. I told him to figure that out and get back to me. I got back to the truffles.
Black truffles and the finest lavender are my major two players in Saturday's finger food fantasia. That is all of the menu I am giving away. A trophy H needs some secrets. I have so few.
MrD got instead a Filipino inspired fusion dish. Venison adobo with the small plantain like Filipino "sava". I even opened him my last jar of homemade green mango pickles to serve as a side with some lavender barley instead of the more fattening rice.
Ah it is grand to be back. Did you miss me?

Life is a beach and then you fly.

2009-12-04T14:44:00.000-08:00

Just back from Boracay Island so famous for its White beach. MrD took me there the first time about 10 years ago. I always try to visit Boracay while I am home in the Philippines. MrD could not make it this trip because he had to return to Vancouver. He is not a big beach fan anyway so I often go alone.
Normally I fly to the local airport of Katiclan. Then its a short ride to the ferry and the 15 minute float to the island docks. This time I chose the second option and landed farther away at Kalibo. A pleasant hotel contact person met me and helped transfer other arriving guests and myself to a waiting bus. The ride form Kalibo took almost 2 hours. Rice fields, banana plants and coconut trees are what you see mostly. A couple of small towns with their school, church and funeral parlor seemed to be the way things were mostly. I noticed the Mormon churches were the wealthiest looking ones but in this country dominated by the catholic church you have to show some pomp to get the poor converts inside to milk their pockets.
I love rice fields. Patchwork quilts of green in several vibrant shades. Rice, at least here in the Philippines is not grown in one large swoop but in small plots all joined together in one big area and separated by tiny raised foot paths that also serve as walls so the farmers can flood the plot needed to grow the rice. The tiny patches of slender seedlings are planted at different times. As they grow the green changes colour. A feast for the eye. In this area the seedlings are still planted by hand in the prepared mud. We saw many farmers planting. Other tiny plots of rice looked ready to harvest. A lot of unhusked but harvested rice was drying in a flat layer spread out onto plastic sheeting right alongside the roads. Looked to me like a slow labour intensive job. Nothing this trophy H has much patience with at all.
The bus took us up and over the coastal hills to the port. After a bit of a snag with their hotel boat not starting we were transferred to a general island ferry. There are two kinds of island ferries. The cheaper open decked ones and the closed air conditioned ones. I prefer the open ones but our hotel contacts put us on the more expensive air conditioned. These faster boats are closed in with fancy ugly drapes to keep the sun out. There is always a television blaring some action film. You are across and docked in 15 minutes. Still another ride in the hotel van and finally you are checked in and sitting by the pool with your welcome drink in hand.
Not bad for a morning's work.
Four days and three nights in paradise complete with a full moon casting its magic and poof the holiday was over. Back in the van. Back on the boat. Back on the bus. Up and over the hills. Through the rice fields. Past the churches, funeral homes and schools to the airport for the 45 minute hop back to Manila and the real world.
I won't go into detail about how lovely the time on Boracay was or what I got up to because by now if you have read any of my other entries you know I am not one to gloat. Much.
Now its just a matter of tying up loose ends at home and the office before heading back to Vancouver. MrD informs me it is quite cold at home there but sunny. Oh Yippee.

All alone again.

2009-11-28T21:01:00.000-08:00

MrD just hopped on a JAL flight heading back to Vancouver with a short layover in Narita. I gave him a duty free shopping list to complete there before he heads into JAL's lounge. I am a big fan of the business lounge with its excellent food choices but not such a fan of JAL. They have the old business class seats. They do not recline to a full flat bed so I prefer to stick with Cathay Pacific for the long haul to and from Manila to Vancouver.
Now that MrD has left and all my trophy H obligations are over and done with I can take a little time off. Tomorrow morning I have an early flight. I will spend four days on my favourite island Boracay here in the Philippines. The famous white sand beach is featured in many world guide books as being in the top ten. The white sand is really dead coral and most of the coral around the island is dead already which is a sad but true fact.
I first went to Boracay about 15 years ago when MrD and I were living in Bangkok, Thailand. We came to the Philippines to visit his family. I was just his friend from Canada back then when he introduced me to his relatives. That introduction never changed but hey this is Asia and we don't talk about. Yeah. Yeah. I am over it. Really I am.
Over the year Boracay has become my own private get away destination whenever I am home in the Philippines. Often MrD does not come with me. One he is not a beach person and two he too busy running the empire. I enjoy taking friends or family. My sister was persuaded to leave cold snowy Canada one January. She insisted on frying under the too hot sun so she could show her work mates when she got back. I just frowned my disapproval and watched her turn pink and later peel and flake but she was happy.
Tourists are constantly being propositioned by beach sellers, massage therapists, boat renters, scuba operators and the list goes on and on. To avoid this a bit I had a tee shirt on which I sewed the words "Welang Pera" in bright shiny red sequins. "Welang pera" is Tagalog (Filipino) meaning "No Money". The shirt was a hit and saved me lots of time. Over the years and my maybe 20 visits to the island I always bring this shirt. Many of the local merchants remember me even without the shirt and greet me with, "Welang Pera. Welcome back." I even had more shirts with many different sayings made up and sold them to others there because I was always being asked where I got the cool shirt.
One of my plans for this trip is to take a self portrait for Christmas. I have done this other years and its a fun idea to share with friends snowed in back in Canada.
My last visit to Manila I tried to get to the island but sat in the domestic airport for six hours while a typhoon shut down the island airport. I never did make it that time. But the weather report for tomorrow is good to go. Time to pack up the #50 sunscreen, some trophy H beach wear and of course the "Welang Pera" tee shirt.

A red letter day.

2009-11-27T00:22:00.000-08:00

Every year about this time when we are home in Manila it is the custom to give the staff who work in our condo a gift of cash. I am sure this is an Asian thing. I am fairly sure it comes from the Chinese because we are supposed to put the money in a red envelope and the Chinese do love their red.
MrD and I go through the list of 20 or so employees and decide who gets what and who gets more than that. We don't even know all their names so I have to ask for an updated list from the office. Once word gets around that the list has been asked for the attitude of the staff all seem to change. They just become more friendly. This builds up over the few days it takes before the delivery of the red envelopes and always makes me smile. I have no problems with the syrupy hellos or them rushing to press the elevator button for me. I am nicer to people who give me money too.
MrD and I just dropped off the cash downstairs with the receptionist so now we will have a day or two of thank yous and smiles and then things will get back to the way they are for the rest of the year.
It is cheaper than our staff in the office. They get an extra month's pay and a trip out of the country. This week they are all in Vietnam for 4 days.
Now that all the extras are taken care of I can get around to the true meaning of Xmas. Shopping for MrD and lovely gifts for myself the trophy H.
HO HO HO
Happy Holidays.

Advance party preparations in Manila.

2009-11-23T23:42:00.000-08:00

This week on Thursday the staff from three of our companies in Manila, Hong Kong and Bangkok are all flying off to meet up in Hanoi, Vietnam for our yearly company holiday. MrD and I do not usually join them because I figured the workers have a better time if the bosses are not around. I seem to remember that was the way I at least felt all those many years ago when I actually had a boss or a real job.
While the cats mice are away MrD has asked me to prepare a party for him this Saturday from 2 - 7 for about 15 "G" guests who are all strangers to each other. The party is to help celebrate his birthday on Dec. 1 when he will be back in Vancouver. I won't be there. I will stay here longer and try to get some R&R on my favourite beach island of Boracay.
I have no problems with party requests. It is all part of what I do as a trophy H. Most of the invites are people I know more than he knows anyway. But I simply will not spend the time slaving in our hot tropical kitchen with this heat even with the air con sucking up the ozone layer.
Being the trophy H that I am I am efficient at planning parties. I have imported smoked Canadian venison, caribou and a couple of kinds of elk along with a few too many blocks and wheels of good old Canadian cheese to add to local tasty bits I can throw together for our guests.
Keep it simple. Keep it tasty and keep it coming is my way of battling the heat on any level.
There is a local farmer's market on Saturday so I can go early and stock up on loads of fresh fruit. The mangoes still warm from the trees are my favourite bites these days but a bit messy for party finger foods. But there is a bounty of good eats out there to satisfy any crowd. I will also pick up an armload of flowers like I normally do on Saturday mornings.
Here in Manila we have a fantastic cleaner Joseph who comes in 5 mornings a week to keep the palace immaculate and up to standards for MrD who some might consider a clean freak. I always head out on morning errands when the cleaner comes to give him all the space to do what ever cleaners do. What he does is beyond me because we really aren't that dirty or disorganised. I did notice he always does things like line up all my spice bottles in neat rows in the cupboard with all the labels facing out. Joseph the cleaning demon also enjoys sorting the kitchen drawers every day so all those spatulas and wooden spoons are in order and facing the same direction. The forks spoons and knives are stacked in perfect lines every morning. Once I came home and Joseph had folded the dirty laundry. But he will be in Hanoi with the rest of our staff from the office and doesn't work weekends anyway.
So glad MrD loves to clean up after parties. We are such a good balance. I cook. He cleans. He makes it. I spend it.
Now where did Joseph file my cheese boards?

Lunch in barong Tagalog with MrD's family.

2009-11-22T02:46:00.000-08:00

Every year around MrD's birthday we take his family to the Makati Shangrila for a buffet lunch. Me being the trophy husband in the country that does not mention anything closely related to the "G" word is always seems to be a bit macabre but then I do like that side of things.
I have a wonderful relationship with MrD's family. Over the years I have become godfather to about three or four of the nephews and nieces. The fact that I am not a Catholic does not seem to bother anyone. I did once have to sit through a rather long and nasty pre baptism speech from a Catholic worker who explained to us all that if we committed some kind of sin then when we died and went to hell a giant worm would eat our insides but we would never be consumed. Good news for us atheist/agnostic non Catholics in the room.
Today I got all the guys in the family to wear the barong Tagalog which is the national costume for the discerning Filipino male and trophy h's of same. Traditionally they are made out of fibres from the pineapple plant, woven and embroidered with astounding detail but now artificial materials are mostly used. Office workers wear a cotton version that is not see through. The see through thing must be avoided with a white undershirt which just makes sense anyway when the tropical sun sweats us into oblivion even with the air conditioners wiping out the ozone layer.
I asked a photographer to come and take the family portrait before we went into lunch so if anyone spilt sauce on their shirt it would not matter.
My barong Tagalog was made for me a few years back when MrD's sister got married. I was not asked to be in the family photo way back then and MrD has suffered with my lament about that ever since.
The buffet at the Shangrila is probably the best thing about Manila. No it is the best thing about the world in general. They have whole sections of the large room sectioned off with Japanese, Western, Indian and Filipino foods. The absolute best dish in the restaurant is the flour less chocolate cake that I diet between visits just so I can have a slice and still fit into all those designer outfits I have to wear to make MrD look good.
Buffets in general are a no no but if you can learn to only eat a little then you can manage. It took me some time to go from "all you can eat" to "eat what you need". Practise makes perfect.
Tomorrow night we will take our Manila staff back to the same restaurant and I will have to eat more chocolate cake. How many hours on the treadmill can I log in before then? I really wish I had some talent for bulimia but sticking my finger down my throat does nothing for me.

Keeping my legs up.

2009-11-19T14:28:00.000-08:00

One of the perks about living in Asia is private health care. No public service here really.
In Vancouver I went to see a doctor about some nasty non trophy husband spider veins on my left calf. The doctor there could do nothing so he would have to send me to a specialist. The clinic receptionist told me they would set up the appointment and get back to me.
That was in July.
I got a call at the end of October that the appointment would be November 19 at 11am. Well I told the clinic that I was going to be back in Asia then and have the treatment and they could stick their appointment book where that other thermometer goes. Thank you very much.
Yesterday I went to my dermatologist here who has been keeping me looking so young, wrinkle free and trophy hansom for MrD all these years. After he zapped off yet another dot of skin from my forehead (never mind that) I showed him my not so lovely leg and he treated me right then and there with leg vein sclerotherapy.
I paid in Pesos and was out of the office in less than an hour instead of about 6 months that the British Columbia health care system was offering.
Thank you private medical service.
I have a bandaged leg for three days and its over. The doctor told me to keep my legs up. Do you think he was implying anything?

back home in Manila

2009-11-18T04:52:00.000-08:00

It might be the jet lag or it might be old age but I have been a mean ugly trophy H to poor MrD. Sarcasm has been rolling off my wrinkeled lips all day. Nothing pleases me.
We cut our stay in Hong Kong short by one day at my request because the hotel bored me, the city bored me, the shopping bored me and the jet lag is driving me nuts.
Back in Manila with temperatures over 30 C. The holiday lights twinkle away in the palm trees in the mall across from our condo.
It was August when I was last here. The longest time I have been away from our tropical home.
I forgot the roses I bought at the Hong Kong flower market at our hotel in HK. They were sitting in water in the marble bathroom. How can you forget two dozen red and white radish roses? At least I have a photo if I have not lost my camera in all this mess. I have not. Just feeling grouchy and sleepy and oh so very tired.
MrD is hiding in his bedroom cringing from my ugly side. Still I am always such a happy camper that this foul mood has some charm. Not much but a little.
And that is all I have to say about the matter.

Jet lagged in Hong Kong

2009-11-16T16:41:00.000-08:00

Well the ordeal of flying in a pressurised tin can for 13 hours while crossing the international date line is over and MrD and I have settled our tired bodies into the charming old Peninsula Hotel in Kowloon, Hong Kong.
I did manage to get some sleep on the plane but of course I still have to deal with jet lag. This morning I was up at 3am and went out for a walk in the chilling darkness of this part of such a very crowded city.
MrD was also up and at the computer doing his running the empire thing so off I went on my own with my camera.
It is a bit spooky to see Kowloon so empty because it is usually packed with so many people and things move at a crawl. Not even the newspaper sellers were up yet. A few tired sex workers going home or not and some police out checking IDs.
MrD and I have already decided to condense all our meetings into today and fly out one day early back to Manila. If we are going to suffer jet lag we might just as well do that in our own home rather than in this pretentious and somewhat dated hotel.
So after a quite authentic eggs benedict with one of our Hong Kong employees and some notes here I am preparing for a trip on the MRT to the Hong Kong flower market to shop for blooms to take back home to Manila tomorrow.
Our Hong Kong friends are complaining about the cold temps of 14 or so but it is a wonderful transition for us before the 30 C waiting for us in Manila when we step off the plane tomorrow.

Today is Saturday and tomorrow is Monday.

2009-11-14T18:22:00.000-08:00

My day started at 4:30 am. only an hour earlier than I am usually awakened by the sounds of MrD preparing my morning coffee. He does that Monday to Friday and I try and get his coffee made at the weekends. Taking turns.
Busy day packing for tonight's long haul flight to Hong Kong. The flight leaves at 2am Sunday and we arrive in Hong Kong on Monday. There is something slightly disconcerting about traveling east far enough to cross the international date line and you move a day ahead in that flash moment. Happy to remember you get the reverse on the return flight when you travel for about 24 hours and get home before you left on the same day. Confused yet? Then there is jet lag but we don't even want to go there just now.
That part takes some getting used to.
I am a one-carry-on, no-check-in, kind of trophy husband but tonight I am traveling with supplies for MrD's gala events. I have to do some "show" cooking at one event so have a bag full of Canadian delicacies like air dried caribou, elk and venison. I am surely the only client checking in on this Cathay flight with a white cabbage. Just can't find a decent head in Manila contrary to what MrD might imply.
The Filipino culture has a tradition with people who have been abroad and have returned. The returning hero must bring gifts for just about everyone. One bag to check in with all the treats and toys and trinkets and dead animal products. A second bag has all my things needed for our 4 day stopover to rest up in Hong Kong before the short hop down to Manila on Thursday.
I hope to get to the fantastic flower market in Kowloon while in Hong Kong so I can take some orchids back to our place in Manila.
I am also lugging some lovely Canadian art as carry on but more on that later.

I had hoped to make an entry in this blog every day. It might get a little confusing for the next bit with missing a day.
MrD and I are just up in the air here until Monday.
We hope.

Packing up in Vancouver to return home to Manila.

2009-11-13T18:42:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow we have to be at the airport around midnight to catch the 2 am flight to Hong Kong where I will spend a few days with MrD visiting our office there and me the middle aged trophy husband doing what comes naturally in Hong Kong like going to the flower market the day before I fly to load up on cheap orchids to take back home to Manila.
This time we are staying in Kowloon instead of on Hong Kong Island in Central. The Peninsula Hong Kong, the old grand dame of the island, is actually in Kowloon and not on Hong Kong Island.
The hotel has the largest fleet of Rolls Royce's in the real world.
We will take the train from the airport. I am not a Rolls fan although it is fun to sit in back and watch MrD pretend not to wave.
Three nights in Hong Kong we have to rest and regenerate from the long 12 hour flight. Then, the short 1 1/2 hour hop down to Manila to put our feet up at home for a bit.
Our return to Asia coincides with MrD's birthday celebrations and our staff outings for three of our Asian companies. Hong Kong, Thailand and the Philippines companies will all gather in Hanoi, Vietnam. MrD and I will see them off but not attend because I figured out they likely have a better time when we are not there. We have joined them in places like Beijing in other years but we try to keep our distance. They are a great...shall I say...team and I love to support them getting out of their shells. It is not just the executives but every employee including the messengers gets to travel.
Enough about the poor team of minions.
MrD and Me?
Normally we each only travel with a small carry on flight bag but MrD has ordered parties to happen and I am the chef so I have raided the larder of Granville Island farmer's market for true Canadian treats like smoked elk, caribou, bison and reindeer and a good selection of local cheese. I am checking in two bags.
I have to make some pizzas for one of the 3 parties we will organise for MrD's family, our Manila staff and some of our inner pinoy circle.
Only one party will be in our place which I fondly refer to as the Palace because the name of our condo building is "The Palisades".
The staff dinner and the family gathering are at different times on different days but at the same 5 star hotel buffet a block away from where we live and also where our office is located.
Asia knows its buffets. This one at the Makati Shangrila has 3 or 4 food stations featuring Japanese, Western, Indian, (the ones with the dots not the feathers) and the tasty filipino treats.
I personally chose this place many years ago for staff and family dinners simply because the dessert chef's flourless chocolate cake is world famous. Once we arrived with a party of 20 only to find out that the cake was not on the offer.
I had a chat with the chef and he offered to go to the kitchen and make one right away to serve our party but I assured him that if it was there every other night I would let him off that one time.
It has always been there since.
When you are old and not doing the desert table like you used to it is understandably important to only eat what you feel you deserve.
I will also visit the famous "Smokey Mountain" city dump with 5,000 homeless scavengers to open the new school we helped build. Our old one got leveled by the bulldozers. It is illegal for us to build anything in the dump.
But we do.
But more on that another day.
Time to pack.

Guten tag it must be Thursday.

2009-11-12T08:45:00.000-08:00

Most Thursdays like today, I head over to Vancouver's famous Granville Island to get farmer's market supplies. Thursday is the best day because most of the produce has arrived but not the swarms of tourists the weekend sees.
I usually just take the ferry across but I today with the sun out and all that lovely snow on the mountain tops I got to yodeling and thought it would be fun to get a Porche and a German chauffeur because the drive across the bridge would be fun.
Last month MrD invited our neighbours, a young straight German couple with a charming daughter, over for dinner. MrD always enjoys the company of anyone who speaks more than just English because the great MrD speaks around 30 languages. (Can't say no in any of them. Doesn't do well listening in any of them either. Meow. Meow Meow.)
It turns out Daddy German is the cook in the family. Mama German is the baker and Daughter German is the princess who will only eat macaroni and cheese.
(I made her a separate meal with mac and cheese three ways because I like to entertain divas.)
Since then I have often met with PG (Papa German)to give him cooking instructions. We head out in his grey Carrera 4 to the local farmer's market on Granville and shop for whatever he is cooking for his family that night. I get what I need. Plus a free ride to the market in a sports cars with a hot German driver. How much is this service? Papa German pays MrD and me 125 bucks a month to park his Porche in our parking spot.
So much better than having to buy one I thought.

Now I have to run. I have to plan the outfit for that creamy brown leather interior. Papa German will be ready on time. It is one of the things we all love about the Germans. Even one minute late causes him inner turmoil and he has to relieve his frustration by squealing his tires in those tight dark turns in the garage.
Auf wiedersehen.

Remembering Day

2009-11-11T11:42:00.001-08:00

Any excuse to wear a bright red poppy.
I happened to be around the cenotaph this morning near 11am. The streets were all blocked off with thousands of remembering Canadians. Maybe a few more than other years. Aircraft flew overhead in formation. Choirs sang. There was a bugle. Silence. Politicians made speeches. Babies cried. The war went on.
Somewhere a new war was just starting. Must remember to save the poppy for next year.
My father had three brothers who joined up for the second world war. Two were killed in the madness and the other lived to tell us what a great time he had in Europe.
MrD missed the ceremony but did get around to wearing a poppy.

Gettting to know MrD and Me.

2009-11-10T10:27:00.000-08:00

OK already I am doing the blogging thang.
Who cares?
I work my manicured fingers to the bone and he won't notice anyway.

...and then just when I was going to pull out my newly blonded hair by what is left of my grey roots he pulled out a jeweller's ring sizing kit and took my ring finger size.
Apparently MrD is designing a ring for our 15th/5th year marriage anniversary next December.

On a more sunny side.
Things are hotting up for this weekend's trip to Asia for the start of 3 gala Christmas/Birthday bashes for MrD.
Our Manila palace in the sky is being transformed by secret pinoy decorating elves even as I type as a surprise for MrD.
Then its sun and sand and massages under the palm trees for me while MrD. returns to Vancouver to prepare for our really big party of the year.
But more on all that later.
Just got a call I have to do publicity shots for my old dear friend the fabulous clown Nion. I know this guys face since 30 years so I hope to get some good shutter noises.
I must go stimulate the economy. I haven't been to Holts all week.
Blah. Blah. Blah. The weather sucks too.