Well it has been a week of Cancer Rocks. I am learning so much during this process. The support of family, friends and acquaintances has been overwhelming, touching and encouraging.
I had my first appointment with the oncologist on Thursday this week at the British Columbia Cancer Agency. My doctor, Sharlene Gill, is not only a senior caregiver but also associate professor of medicine at the University of British Columbia. She knows what she is talking about and puts all the information out to me in ways I can understand and absorb.
She recommended chemo and planed to admit me on Monday for the first treatment so they can monitor my side effects. The other treatments would be as an outpatient.
But, and here comes the hard part, my silent reader, she said the chemo could only hope to enhance the quality of my life because at this stage of my cancer there was no hope for a cure. Here prognosis is she thinks I have 3-4 months to live.
Friday I spoke to her on the phone and we have agreed to postpone the chemo but I have since decided not to have chemo. There is no hope for a cure and I feel too week. I have already registered with palliative care. I have not given up, but given in to the cancer.
MrD is busy with his alternative treatments for me and we will go from here.
On the lighter side, my silent reader, having cancer has opened up a whole new world.
A few examples are.
You can once again fit into any of your old clothes.
You attend a social meet up where home made pastry is included. You are sure to get offered the choice of leftovers.
Your spouse cuts way back on your “to do” list.
After all these years of saying no because it is fattening, you are encouraged to eat the crispy brown chicken skin.
You need not pass up on the desert.
It is fun to pretend there is a friendly alien hiding in you guts.
Sometimes it feels important to take a day off away from people stuffing you full of healthy food. It just reminds you that you are ill.
Folks want to take you out for lunch more and most insist on paying the bill.
Being on this “get fat” diet means you get to eat food you had deprived yourself. I ate poutine for the first time in ten years.
You get appointments to meet new people in new places you have never been.
You take time to stop and smell the roses.
*hug*
ReplyDeleteyou have a way of expressing calm wisdom through your light hearted observations. you are a brave soul to face adversity with wit and sensitivity. i love you from the bottom of my heart. no panicy phone call, just my love from me to you. kurt and i send you our love and a big long hug for you and dan. i'm so glad he is there with you every step of the way. snuggles from the kitties.
ReplyDeleteYour friends are inspired by your way of facing reality. It is so easy to share roses and pastries with you, but so difficult to take part of your burden...
ReplyDeleteHugs and prayer in this new step, great Chef.
My DEAREST, DEAREST Friend.... from so far but from so close in heart... mon frère siamois, mon ami de coeur et d'esprit, Je t'aime. Je t'aime for what you are, je t'aime for what you have been for me for so long now, je t'aime for what you are and for what I would like to resemble you with, this amazing difference but this similarity... Je t'aime for all these amazing nights of laughter, je t'aime for these amazing memories in Manila, your amazing costumes, your sense of freedom, your wisdom, your words, your way of making me look at things in a different way... god I wished I had listened to you more.... Je t'aime for the memory of you, pour le bien-être de penser que tu es, malgré toute la distance qui nous sépare, l'ami le plus précieux que j'ai. Je t'aime tout court........ All my thoughts and love are with you. Je t'aime. Andrée xxxxxxxxxxxx
ReplyDeleteWishing you and Dan all the best, i just really wish i could give you the biggest hug and tell you that we love you very much, this saddens me more then words can explain and wish we could have spent more time together through the years, im so happy and please and honourd that you got the oppertunity to meet my daughter and my soon to be husband. We both love you very so much uncle xo <3
ReplyDeleteDear friend you are a very beautiful person.
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